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¶ Batman
2
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(male narrator)
A tranquil day
in Gotham City
3
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and what could be
more soothing
4
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than a couple of hours
in Minerva's Mineral Spa.
5
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For a millionaire who does
nothing but count his money
6
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you stay in
pretty fair condition.
7
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Oh, I try to keep
pretty active with..
8
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...falconry and spelunking..
9
00:00:30,158 --> 00:00:32,625
...and you people here
at Minerva's Mineral Spa
10
00:00:32,627 --> 00:00:34,693
keep me in
pretty good shape.
11
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Well, that'll about
do it for you, sir.
12
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Unless you'd like one of
13
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Minerva's eggplant-jelly
vitamin scalp massages.
14
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No, I've got to get dressed
and get out. Thank you.
15
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But for another millionaire
not so pressed for time
16
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the renowned
scalp massage of Minerva
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one of Gotham City's most
beautiful and glamorous women
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is about to produce
some amazing results.
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Tell me, darling
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how did you collect that
divine fortune of yours?
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By never taking a beautiful
woman at face value, Minerva.
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Tell me some more, darling.
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Tell me where do you
keep that fortune.
24
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[intense music]
25
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[whirring]
26
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Two million dollars worth
of negotiable securities
27
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in the grandfathers clock.
Of course.
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Well, of course!
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There you are, darling.
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(Minerva)
'Atlas, put Mr. Dozier
into my parfume pressurizer.'
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And still another millionaire..
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Tell me, darling
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how did you become
a rich television producer?
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By never hiring
method actors, Minerva
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and by always
ignoring network executives.
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Tell me some more.
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Where do you keep
that lovely loot of yours?
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[intense music]
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[whirring]
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In the television set,
of course.
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But, of course!
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(Minerva)
'Here you are, darling.'
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I hope you enjoyed
your treatment.
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Minerva, after
every visit to your spa
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I always feel
like a new man.
46
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I feel like
a new man too, Bruce.
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- 'Bruce. Bruce Wayne.'
- Hello, Sam. How are you?
48
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Thank you, Bruce, my wife
was absolutely thrilled
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to get that invitation to
the private Wayne Foundation
50
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showing of the greatest
diamonds in the world next week.
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It'll be an interesting affair.
The major stones are here.
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Under lock
and key, I hope.
53
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Oh, yes, they're quite safe
in the Wayne Foundation vault.
54
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Oh, Minerva, has my wife
shown up to pick me up yet?
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I'll check with Aphrodite.
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Anything wrong, darling?
57
00:03:13,896 --> 00:03:17,764
I thought I left
my wristwatch in this box.
58
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Aphrodite, did Mr. Shubert's
wife arrive yet?
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Yes, she's in
the waiting room.
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- This way please.
- Oh, thank you.
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Minerva, Bruce,
I'll see you later.
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Yes, goodbye, sir.
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You were saying?
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Oh, it's nothing.
I must've been mistaken.
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- Good day.
- Come back soon, darling.
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Those emeralds, Minerva.
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They were in Mrs. Carson's
cookie jar, just like you said.
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Of course they were.
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00:03:43,551 --> 00:03:45,250
But I'm no longer
interested in emeralds.
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Now, that I have a way to get
into the Wayne Foundation vault.
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- That watch!
- Yes, that watch.
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With this watch,
I'm going to have my hands
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00:03:53,391 --> 00:03:55,224
on the worlds
largest diamonds.
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And thus, glorious,
glamorous, glittering, power!
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[theme music]
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¶ Batman
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¶ Batman
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¶ Batman
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¶ Batman
80
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¶ Batman
81
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¶ Batman
82
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¶ Batman
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¶ Batman
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¶ Batman
85
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¶ Batman
86
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¶ Na na na na na
na na na na na ¶
87
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¶ Batman
88
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[instrumental music]
89
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Freddie, I have some fast
fencing for you to do.
90
00:05:14,392 --> 00:05:19,495
I am not known as the fat French
Freddie the Fence for nothing.
91
00:05:19,497 --> 00:05:21,396
Shortly I'll have
the combination
92
00:05:21,398 --> 00:05:23,297
of the Wayne Foundation vault.
93
00:05:23,299 --> 00:05:26,967
And then you'll have the world's
largest diamonds to fence.
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00:05:26,969 --> 00:05:31,271
Famous diamonds are
not easy to fence, Minerva.
95
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[chuckles]
96
00:05:31,840 --> 00:05:37,610
If I can get them, Freddie,
you can fence them.
97
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[chuckles]
98
00:05:39,712 --> 00:05:41,813
Frankly, I'm stumped.
99
00:05:41,815 --> 00:05:44,448
And only Mr. Dozier
knew those securities
100
00:05:44,450 --> 00:05:47,517
were in that
grandfather's clock.
101
00:05:47,885 --> 00:05:51,921
And Mr. Horwitz's cash
out of his TV set.
102
00:05:51,923 --> 00:05:53,756
But someone else
stole 'em, commissioner.
103
00:05:53,758 --> 00:05:56,625
That's right, and Mrs. Shubert
pearls outta her tea urn
104
00:05:56,627 --> 00:05:58,960
and Mr. Converse's bonds
out of his sleeping bag.
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00:05:58,962 --> 00:06:01,529
Well, if you ask me,
the millionaires in the city
106
00:06:01,531 --> 00:06:04,765
certainly choose strange hiding
places for their valuables.
107
00:06:04,767 --> 00:06:08,335
But known only
to themselves,Barbara.
108
00:06:08,337 --> 00:06:12,472
Each swears no other soul
alive was in on their secret.
109
00:06:12,474 --> 00:06:17,310
But we oughta let someone else
in on our problem, commissioner.
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Your problem, Chief O'Hara,
is that leg of yours
111
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that you sprained
when you were playing Ping-Pong.
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I'll take care
of the little things like, uh
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stolen bonds and emeralds
and, uh, securities.
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You've found my watch, Minerva.
115
00:06:30,690 --> 00:06:35,926
Yes. It must've fallen outta
the box when I unlocked it.
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I'll send someone down for it.
117
00:06:37,529 --> 00:06:39,695
Why don't you
come for it yourself?
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[beeping]
'A special treat for you.'
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A treat, Minerva?
120
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- I'll be there shortly.
- One moment, sir.
121
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- Yes, commissioner.
- 'Batman, we need your help.'
122
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About a rash of robberies for
which there is no explanation.
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00:06:53,107 --> 00:06:55,774
'Millionaire William Dozier's
securities stolen'
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'out of grandfather's clock.'
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00:06:56,810 --> 00:07:01,479
Oil heiress Camille Carson's
emeralds from her cookie jar.
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(Gordon)
'Producer Howie Horwitz's
cash out of his TV set.'
127
00:07:05,384 --> 00:07:07,717
We'll be there as quickly
as possible, commissioner
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00:07:07,719 --> 00:07:09,752
but first I have
one errand to run.
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- Did you hear that, Dick?
- A bit.
130
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Emeralds, cookie jars,
bonds and TV sets.
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It's the victims that
make this case intriguing
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and unique, they're all
immensely wealthy.
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And they're all frequenters
of Minerva's Mineral Spa.
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Gosh, Bruce, would Minerva
stoop to something like that?
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It's hard to believe,
Dick. She's so beautiful.
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And worth investigating.
137
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- To the Bat-poles?
- You to the Bat-poles, Dick.
138
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You take the Batmobile
with a spare Bat-suit for me
139
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and I want you
to meet me behind the spa.
140
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I'll take my own car
and be sure and find you.
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Roger.
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I came here to pick up a watch.
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And I get a free eggplant-jelly
vitamins scalp massage.
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That was my special
little treat on the house
145
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because of that silly
misunderstanding
146
00:07:56,759 --> 00:07:57,591
over your watch.
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Now this is only
going to take a minute.
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[intense music]
149
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[whirring]
150
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'The combination to
the Wayne Foundation vault.'
151
00:08:17,510 --> 00:08:19,877
Right seven times to eight..
152
00:08:19,879 --> 00:08:23,647
...left four times
past six to eleven.
153
00:08:23,649 --> 00:08:28,118
Right twice to nine,
left to three.
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And...open.
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[music continues]
156
00:08:38,527 --> 00:08:40,961
Oh! That was marvelous, Minerva.
157
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Uh, there you are, my darling.
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Your root ends
are really glowing.
159
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Here you are, darling.
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Thank you.
161
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Are you sure I can't
pay you anything
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00:08:58,810 --> 00:09:00,876
for the special treatment,
Minerva?
163
00:09:00,878 --> 00:09:04,112
Seeing you again
was payment enough.
164
00:09:04,114 --> 00:09:06,848
[phone ringing]
Excuse me.
165
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Minerva's Mineral Spa.
166
00:09:10,918 --> 00:09:12,852
Lord Easy Street.
167
00:09:12,854 --> 00:09:14,220
'Hello, Easy.'
168
00:09:14,222 --> 00:09:16,055
'I haven't seen you for ages.'
169
00:09:16,057 --> 00:09:18,557
I'll meet you
in the alley in a moment.
170
00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:20,458
I don't know what's up
but I suspect
171
00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:23,194
Batman and Robin
should investigate further.
172
00:09:23,196 --> 00:09:27,097
Yes, yes, 4:30 is good enough
for a scalp massage.
173
00:09:27,099 --> 00:09:31,067
Tell Commissioner Gordon
that we might be detained.
174
00:09:31,069 --> 00:09:33,270
Divine, darling.
175
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'Divine.'
176
00:09:37,341 --> 00:09:40,843
- How'd it go, Minerva?
- Beautifully.
177
00:09:40,845 --> 00:09:42,311
But..
178
00:09:43,212 --> 00:09:44,645
(Minerva)
'Hello.'
179
00:09:44,647 --> 00:09:46,813
We like the full treatment,
please.
180
00:09:46,815 --> 00:09:49,582
Well, of course,
register for both.
181
00:09:49,584 --> 00:09:51,584
Yourself and your son.
182
00:09:51,586 --> 00:09:54,820
Although I'd be proud
if he were this is not my son
183
00:09:54,822 --> 00:09:57,722
this is Robin
the Boy Wonder. I'm Batman.
184
00:09:57,724 --> 00:10:00,291
Oh, I'm so sorry,
I couldn't recognize your face
185
00:10:00,293 --> 00:10:04,061
but your physic
was very familiar.
186
00:10:05,029 --> 00:10:06,929
Check your valuables
and after disrobed
187
00:10:06,931 --> 00:10:09,898
Adonis and Apollo are
going to start you off.
188
00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:11,132
We have no valuables to check.
189
00:10:11,134 --> 00:10:14,969
And if we disrobed we'd reveal
our secret true identities.
190
00:10:14,971 --> 00:10:19,974
Too bad. You can't get the value
of my mineral spa fully dressed.
191
00:10:19,976 --> 00:10:22,376
Our boots, leotards,
gauntlets, capes, cowls
192
00:10:22,378 --> 00:10:25,212
and even our utility belts
are more permeable
193
00:10:25,214 --> 00:10:27,180
than you might think.
194
00:10:27,182 --> 00:10:28,781
Shall we start?
195
00:10:28,783 --> 00:10:30,949
This way, gentlemen.
196
00:10:31,383 --> 00:10:34,385
[intense music]
197
00:10:37,222 --> 00:10:38,889
What's the matter, Minerva?
198
00:10:38,891 --> 00:10:39,656
I don't know.
199
00:10:39,658 --> 00:10:43,292
But my female intuition tells
me there's something wrong.
200
00:10:43,294 --> 00:10:46,895
I had a strange feeling
that millionaire Bruce Wayne
201
00:10:46,897 --> 00:10:49,898
was issuing instruction
through his watch.
202
00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:50,298
Huh?
203
00:10:50,300 --> 00:10:54,068
And Batman is
a close friend of his.
204
00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:56,203
Be sure that
those Dynamic Darlings
205
00:10:56,205 --> 00:10:57,370
get our full treatment.
206
00:10:57,372 --> 00:11:02,875
Including some extra pressuring
in my parfume pressurizer.
207
00:11:02,877 --> 00:11:05,077
Persimmon pressurizer, Minerva.
208
00:11:05,079 --> 00:11:07,746
Call it whatever
you want but do it..
209
00:11:07,748 --> 00:11:12,217
...while I'm going to
Wayne Foundation vault.
210
00:11:13,686 --> 00:11:15,653
Yes, I'm looking
forward to Minerva's
211
00:11:15,655 --> 00:11:18,922
famous eggplant-jelly
vitamin scalp massage.
212
00:11:18,924 --> 00:11:22,959
Minerva thought you might pop
them into the pressurizer first.
213
00:11:22,961 --> 00:11:24,126
Persimmon Pressurizer?
214
00:11:24,128 --> 00:11:26,661
Holy astringent plum-like fruit!
215
00:11:26,663 --> 00:11:28,863
Only astringent
until ripe, Robin.
216
00:11:28,865 --> 00:11:32,066
I think you'll find
the experience most palatable.
217
00:11:32,068 --> 00:11:34,301
This way, gentlemen.
218
00:11:36,704 --> 00:11:38,237
Atlas, what's up?
219
00:11:38,239 --> 00:11:41,974
Minerva wants them
permanently pressurized.
220
00:11:42,675 --> 00:11:45,677
[intense music]
221
00:11:52,017 --> 00:11:54,084
The experience
may be palatable, Batman
222
00:11:54,086 --> 00:11:56,886
but I don't like
the looks of this thing.
223
00:11:56,888 --> 00:11:58,087
Me neither, Robin.
224
00:11:58,089 --> 00:12:01,990
It's not how the pressurizer
looks that counts, Batman.
225
00:12:01,992 --> 00:12:05,193
It's how you're going to
look when you're in it.
226
00:12:05,195 --> 00:12:07,762
And when it's finished with you!
227
00:12:07,764 --> 00:12:10,765
[dramatic music]
228
00:12:11,433 --> 00:12:16,069
So Mischievous Minerva
pursues her malfeasant maneuver
229
00:12:16,071 --> 00:12:18,438
at the Wayne Foundation.
230
00:12:18,440 --> 00:12:20,907
"Left to three."
231
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,775
And..
232
00:12:24,777 --> 00:12:26,410
...voila.
233
00:12:27,345 --> 00:12:27,944
Oh.
234
00:12:27,946 --> 00:12:33,349
Oh! You beautiful,
beautiful, darlings.
235
00:12:34,718 --> 00:12:38,787
Oh. I love you.
I love you!
236
00:12:41,023 --> 00:12:42,857
Some more.
237
00:12:44,759 --> 00:12:46,459
While our fearless
crime-fighters
238
00:12:46,461 --> 00:12:51,730
face a fate usually
befalling frozen foods.
239
00:12:53,799 --> 00:12:55,900
Holy human pressure cookers.
240
00:12:55,902 --> 00:12:58,435
An apt expression, Robin.
241
00:12:58,437 --> 00:13:00,336
Too apt.
242
00:13:12,315 --> 00:13:13,248
Minerva, they're gone.
243
00:13:13,250 --> 00:13:16,317
They are not gone,
they are just not here.
244
00:13:16,319 --> 00:13:18,018
Isn't that the same thing?
245
00:13:18,020 --> 00:13:20,754
They're completely pressurized.
246
00:13:20,756 --> 00:13:24,224
There's nothing left
of the little darling.
247
00:13:24,226 --> 00:13:25,525
Let's take off
with their loot.
248
00:13:25,527 --> 00:13:28,427
Not until my dear friend
Lord Easy Street
249
00:13:28,429 --> 00:13:32,364
has his vitamin
scalp massage at 4:30.
250
00:13:32,366 --> 00:13:33,832
Why wait for that?
251
00:13:33,834 --> 00:13:35,533
Because he's
the world's richest man.
252
00:13:35,535 --> 00:13:39,036
And just think about those
thoughts he's going to transfer.
253
00:13:39,038 --> 00:13:40,904
Think about the thoughts
that millionaire Bruce will
254
00:13:40,906 --> 00:13:45,008
transfer to the police when he
finds out the diamonds are gone.
255
00:13:45,010 --> 00:13:45,842
I reset the dial.
256
00:13:45,844 --> 00:13:49,345
It'll them at least two weeks
before they can get in.
257
00:13:49,347 --> 00:13:51,313
And in the meanwhile..
258
00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:53,914
But in the meantime,
what's this?
259
00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:58,451
The pressurized cantainer's
alive?
260
00:13:59,219 --> 00:14:04,089
And heading into
the Bat-cave on the double.
261
00:14:04,824 --> 00:14:09,227
Where a vastly relieved
Alfred awaits them.
262
00:14:09,229 --> 00:14:12,330
I must say, sir,
I'm delighted to see you both.
263
00:14:12,332 --> 00:14:13,331
We're delighted to be here.
264
00:14:13,333 --> 00:14:15,966
And wouldn't be if Batman
hadn't the foresight
265
00:14:15,968 --> 00:14:18,535
to pop steam
neutralizing Bat-pellets
266
00:14:18,537 --> 00:14:19,869
into his utility belt.
267
00:14:19,871 --> 00:14:21,503
Steam neutralizing Bat-pellets?
268
00:14:21,505 --> 00:14:23,071
I'll explain
in more detail later.
269
00:14:23,073 --> 00:14:25,006
Now I must get
to Commissioner Gordon.
270
00:14:25,008 --> 00:14:27,375
About Madam Minerva, I presume.
271
00:14:27,377 --> 00:14:28,342
Definitely about Minerva.
272
00:14:28,344 --> 00:14:32,446
Her three Greek goons popped us
into a human pressure cooker.
273
00:14:32,448 --> 00:14:33,180
Oh, my word.
274
00:14:33,182 --> 00:14:37,150
And soon we'll be finding out
how Minerva fits in to this.
275
00:14:37,152 --> 00:14:41,254
And how you may be
fitting in to the picture.
276
00:14:42,155 --> 00:14:43,455
Me?
277
00:14:44,223 --> 00:14:48,392
My three beautiful boys
put Batman and Robin
278
00:14:48,394 --> 00:14:50,427
in my parfume pressurizer
279
00:14:50,429 --> 00:14:52,929
and pressurized them to death?
280
00:14:52,931 --> 00:14:53,429
[chuckles]
281
00:14:53,431 --> 00:14:56,131
(Minerva)
'That's utter nonsense.'
282
00:14:56,133 --> 00:14:59,501
It isn't nonsense that
they tried to, Minerva.
283
00:14:59,869 --> 00:15:03,271
How young and healthy you boys
look after treatment in my spa.
284
00:15:03,273 --> 00:15:07,475
We're lucky we even look alive
after that pressure cooking.
285
00:15:07,477 --> 00:15:08,275
I am so sorry.
286
00:15:08,277 --> 00:15:11,478
Something must've gone
wrong with one of the machines.
287
00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:14,013
But to accuse me
and my staff
288
00:15:14,015 --> 00:15:19,218
for attempting murder
is completely ridiculous.
289
00:15:19,220 --> 00:15:21,520
Well, now that this
little misunderstanding
290
00:15:21,522 --> 00:15:22,454
is straightened out--
291
00:15:22,456 --> 00:15:25,190
Not exactly straightened
out, Minerva.
292
00:15:25,192 --> 00:15:29,327
Just where did you pick up
those three male assistants?
293
00:15:29,329 --> 00:15:31,929
I don't pick up man.
294
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:32,462
Man pick me up.
295
00:15:32,464 --> 00:15:35,465
(Minerva)
'But really, Batman,
don't be so square.'
296
00:15:35,467 --> 00:15:38,034
In an hour's time
I have an appointment
297
00:15:38,036 --> 00:15:42,505
with my dear old friend
Lord Easy Street
298
00:15:42,507 --> 00:15:45,975
for a vitamin scalp massage.
299
00:15:46,109 --> 00:15:48,944
I mustn't disappoint him.
300
00:15:49,912 --> 00:15:50,912
Oh, no, of course not.
301
00:15:50,914 --> 00:15:55,349
I'm sorry we inconvenienced you
by asking you to come here.
302
00:15:55,351 --> 00:15:57,150
Not at all.
303
00:15:57,384 --> 00:15:58,317
Not at all.
304
00:15:58,319 --> 00:16:01,086
May I show you
to the elevator?
305
00:16:01,088 --> 00:16:02,887
Yes, please.
306
00:16:06,591 --> 00:16:10,160
Oh, Barbara, Minerva,
my daughter.
307
00:16:10,162 --> 00:16:11,661
Hello.
308
00:16:12,129 --> 00:16:13,929
Goodbye.
309
00:16:16,499 --> 00:16:20,502
Well, the fabulous Minerva.
310
00:16:21,270 --> 00:16:22,436
Who knows just how fabulous.
311
00:16:22,438 --> 00:16:25,939
What's the matter? You all look
as sober as a glass of water.
312
00:16:25,941 --> 00:16:29,575
An attempt on one's life
has a rather sobering effect.
313
00:16:29,577 --> 00:16:33,579
Someone tried to kill
you, Batman and Robin?
314
00:16:34,948 --> 00:16:36,381
Was Minerva involved?
315
00:16:36,383 --> 00:16:39,917
It's hard to say at this point.
316
00:16:39,919 --> 00:16:41,051
Sure'n it is.
317
00:16:41,053 --> 00:16:43,553
Uh, what are you plans, Batman?
318
00:16:43,555 --> 00:16:45,154
Chief O'Hara,
I happen to know someone
319
00:16:45,156 --> 00:16:48,524
who bears a striking resemblance
to Lord Easy Street.
320
00:16:48,526 --> 00:16:50,659
Gosh, yes,
so you do, Batman.
321
00:16:50,661 --> 00:16:53,995
And if he were to be...detained
322
00:16:53,997 --> 00:16:58,132
so that he couldn't make his
4:30 appointment at Minerva's--
323
00:16:58,134 --> 00:16:58,999
Say no more, Batman.
324
00:16:59,001 --> 00:17:01,501
Lord Easy Street was in
the library only this morning
325
00:17:01,503 --> 00:17:04,437
looking for a rare volume
on the Vespers Sparrow.
326
00:17:04,439 --> 00:17:07,940
He's a multimillionaire bird
watcher among his other multi's.
327
00:17:07,942 --> 00:17:10,208
I could call and tell him
I found the book
328
00:17:10,210 --> 00:17:13,544
'which indeed I did at one
of the branch libraries.'
329
00:17:13,546 --> 00:17:14,411
That should distract him
330
00:17:14,413 --> 00:17:18,214
from any other plans
he might have this afternoon.
331
00:17:20,083 --> 00:17:23,351
What a charming
and beautiful lady Minerva is.
332
00:17:23,353 --> 00:17:27,054
We should all be ashamed
of our suspicions.
333
00:17:27,056 --> 00:17:28,655
[phone ringing]
334
00:17:29,356 --> 00:17:31,357
Commissioner Gordon.
335
00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:34,059
What? What?
336
00:17:34,061 --> 00:17:35,026
(Gordon)
'What?'
337
00:17:35,028 --> 00:17:38,662
Well, of course,
we'll get on it at once.
338
00:17:39,497 --> 00:17:40,396
What was all that?
339
00:17:40,398 --> 00:17:42,998
The head of security
at the Wayne Foundation
340
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:44,065
someone's tampered
with the vault
341
00:17:44,067 --> 00:17:47,134
containing all those diamonds
for their private showing.
342
00:17:47,136 --> 00:17:48,301
The combination's been changed
343
00:17:48,303 --> 00:17:50,102
and no ones knows
if anything's taken.
344
00:17:50,104 --> 00:17:52,437
I must get in touch
with Bruce at once.
345
00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:53,671
You mean,
millionaire Bruce Wayne.
346
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:55,639
I believe he's
out of town for the day.
347
00:17:55,641 --> 00:17:58,241
I'd better make that
phone call about the book.
348
00:17:58,243 --> 00:18:01,410
I think His Lordship
is staying at the Gotham Towers.
349
00:18:01,412 --> 00:18:05,481
Who is that man who bears
such a striking resemblance
350
00:18:05,483 --> 00:18:07,649
to multimillionaire
Lord Easy Street?
351
00:18:07,651 --> 00:18:12,453
Coincidentally it's millionaire
Bruce Wayne's butler Alfred.
352
00:18:13,655 --> 00:18:16,423
You won't believe this
but they are still alive.
353
00:18:16,425 --> 00:18:17,857
We'd better
make tracks quick then.
354
00:18:17,859 --> 00:18:22,661
Not until my dear old friend
Lord Easy Street..
355
00:18:24,196 --> 00:18:26,430
Go on, boys. Go on.
356
00:18:27,198 --> 00:18:28,598
Hello, Minerva.
357
00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:31,667
My dear, surely
you recognize me.
358
00:18:31,669 --> 00:18:33,235
I'm Lord Easy Street.
359
00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:35,437
Oh, of course, Easy.
360
00:18:35,439 --> 00:18:37,806
It's only that you're
little bit thinner
361
00:18:37,808 --> 00:18:40,642
and a little tiny bit older.
362
00:18:40,644 --> 00:18:43,344
Well, years have
a way of catching up
363
00:18:43,346 --> 00:18:45,546
with us multimillionaires,
Minerva.
364
00:18:45,548 --> 00:18:47,214
Just as with
the common people.
365
00:18:47,216 --> 00:18:51,551
But perhaps your eggplant-jelly
vitamin scalp massage
366
00:18:51,553 --> 00:18:54,620
might prove,
uh, rejuvenating.
367
00:18:54,622 --> 00:18:56,455
It does wonders, Easy.
368
00:18:56,457 --> 00:18:59,591
Not miracles, but wonders.
369
00:18:59,593 --> 00:19:01,693
Shall we try?
370
00:19:05,531 --> 00:19:06,464
They're gone!
371
00:19:06,466 --> 00:19:08,599
Every diamond
in that vault is gone.
372
00:19:08,601 --> 00:19:10,767
Batman, how could
you have opened a vault
373
00:19:10,769 --> 00:19:14,837
to which you didn't know the
combination in three seconds?
374
00:19:14,839 --> 00:19:15,804
With my three seconds flat
375
00:19:15,806 --> 00:19:18,907
Bat-vault combination
unscrambler, commissioner.
376
00:19:18,909 --> 00:19:19,641
Amazing.
377
00:19:19,643 --> 00:19:21,509
I must notify the insurance
companies at once.
378
00:19:21,511 --> 00:19:26,447
We must throw a cordon of police
around the Gotham City. Come on.
379
00:19:29,417 --> 00:19:31,551
Well, Batman,
back to the Bat-cave?
380
00:19:31,553 --> 00:19:34,287
No, Robin.
To Minerva's Mineral Spa.
381
00:19:34,289 --> 00:19:39,458
I strongly suspect she extracted
the combination to this vault
382
00:19:39,460 --> 00:19:40,425
from Bruce Wayne's brain
383
00:19:40,427 --> 00:19:45,229
via her eggplant-jelly
vitamin scalp massage.
384
00:19:45,231 --> 00:19:46,730
Holy skull tap.
385
00:19:46,732 --> 00:19:47,530
Exactly, Robin.
386
00:19:47,532 --> 00:19:50,933
Which she might be doing
at this very moment with Alfred.
387
00:19:50,935 --> 00:19:55,170
Extracting secrets
he must never reveal.
388
00:19:55,172 --> 00:19:56,938
To the spa.
389
00:19:57,839 --> 00:19:59,806
While at this very minute
390
00:19:59,808 --> 00:20:02,875
Barbara Gordon has
had a similar hunch.
391
00:20:02,877 --> 00:20:07,212
Has made her challenging
change in to Batgirl.
392
00:20:07,214 --> 00:20:11,216
And is off to do
her bit for Alfred.
393
00:20:11,218 --> 00:20:13,851
Aboard the Batgirl's Cycle.
394
00:20:18,223 --> 00:20:19,623
Just relax, darling
395
00:20:19,625 --> 00:20:24,327
and think about your many,
many, many millions.
396
00:20:27,331 --> 00:20:30,333
[intense music]
397
00:20:35,339 --> 00:20:38,541
It should be clear
to almost anyone
398
00:20:38,543 --> 00:20:42,478
that I'm not multimillionaire
Lord Easy Street.
399
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:44,880
(Minerva)
'But actually I am..'
400
00:20:44,882 --> 00:20:46,681
'But actually I am..'
401
00:20:46,683 --> 00:20:48,649
But actually I am..
402
00:20:48,651 --> 00:20:50,717
'But actually I am..'
403
00:20:51,251 --> 00:20:53,418
Go on, darling,
don't stall now.
404
00:20:53,420 --> 00:20:55,319
Don't stall!
405
00:20:58,289 --> 00:20:59,522
Batgirl, stop it. Stop it.
406
00:20:59,524 --> 00:21:01,590
- Stop it.
- Yes, let go.
407
00:21:01,592 --> 00:21:04,459
Adonis, Apollo,
come and help.
408
00:21:04,461 --> 00:21:06,494
Help! Help!
409
00:21:06,761 --> 00:21:07,894
Grab her, grab him.
410
00:21:07,896 --> 00:21:10,263
He's a darling old phony.
411
00:21:10,265 --> 00:21:11,998
Put them both in
my parfume pressurizer.
412
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:16,268
While I get Freddie the Fence
and start packing.
413
00:21:17,303 --> 00:21:20,305
[intense music]
414
00:21:25,978 --> 00:21:28,012
Higher, boys.
Put it on higher.
415
00:21:28,014 --> 00:21:30,481
Freddie the Fence has flown.
416
00:21:32,784 --> 00:21:36,920
Extra steam neutralizing
Bat-pellets, Batman?
417
00:21:38,889 --> 00:21:41,891
[dramatic music]
418
00:22:11,421 --> 00:22:14,523
[music continues]
419
00:22:30,840 --> 00:22:33,942
[music continues]
420
00:23:00,970 --> 00:23:03,972
[dramatic music]
421
00:23:13,482 --> 00:23:16,617
[instrumental music]
422
00:23:17,685 --> 00:23:20,520
I must say, Batgirl,
it was rather fortunate
423
00:23:20,522 --> 00:23:23,122
that this thing
short-circuited
424
00:23:23,124 --> 00:23:25,657
before I divulged my..
425
00:23:25,659 --> 00:23:27,125
Our little secret.
426
00:23:27,127 --> 00:23:30,027
Yes, I'd say it was too,
Alfred.
427
00:23:30,029 --> 00:23:32,562
[imitating Minerva]
Darling.
428
00:23:34,131 --> 00:23:37,133
[intense music]
429
00:23:42,372 --> 00:23:45,140
So, darlings, you caught
Freddie the Fence
430
00:23:45,142 --> 00:23:46,708
just before he flew.
431
00:23:46,710 --> 00:23:48,009
At the airport, Minerva.
432
00:23:48,011 --> 00:23:49,076
Just as he started to sing.
433
00:23:49,078 --> 00:23:53,914
I told you, Minerva, it is not
easy to fence famous diamonds.
434
00:23:53,916 --> 00:23:58,551
Easier than to try to fly
without wings, Freddie.
435
00:23:58,553 --> 00:24:01,887
There are more song birds
in the rear of the store.
436
00:24:01,889 --> 00:24:03,388
Plus a canary named Aphrodite.
437
00:24:03,390 --> 00:24:08,092
Maybe I should've called it
Minerva's Musical Spa.
438
00:24:08,460 --> 00:24:10,527
It has rhythm, Minerva.
439
00:24:10,661 --> 00:24:14,830
So has the paddy wagon
and it's raring to go.
440
00:24:14,832 --> 00:24:16,398
Go on.
441
00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:17,432
How divine.
442
00:24:17,434 --> 00:24:19,534
I'm going to make
Gotham State Prison
443
00:24:19,536 --> 00:24:22,770
the world's most elegant spa.
444
00:24:24,539 --> 00:24:27,674
[instrumental music]
445
00:24:31,979 --> 00:24:34,580
What happened to Batgirl?
446
00:24:35,515 --> 00:24:36,748
Who knows, Robin.
447
00:24:36,750 --> 00:24:38,683
Who ever knows?
448
00:24:42,154 --> 00:24:45,022
[theme music]
449
00:24:45,024 --> 00:24:47,057
¶ Batman
450
00:24:48,159 --> 00:24:50,193
¶ Batman
451
00:24:51,428 --> 00:24:53,095
¶ Batman
452
00:24:54,630 --> 00:24:56,564
¶ Batman
453
00:24:57,766 --> 00:24:59,466
¶ Batman
454
00:24:59,468 --> 00:25:00,900
¶ Batman
455
00:25:00,902 --> 00:25:03,469
¶ Batman
456
00:25:04,971 --> 00:25:07,906
¶ Na na na na na na
Na na na na ¶
457
00:25:07,908 --> 00:25:10,642
¶ Batman