1
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¶ Batman
2
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[dramatic music]
3
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(male announcer)
Night over Gotham City.
4
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But what else is
over Gotham City?
5
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Not flying saucers.
6
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I'm sorry, sir, but we know
nothing about it at all.
7
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I'm sorry but we have absolutely
no information, madam.
8
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Yes.
9
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I'm sorry but..
10
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An imminent invasion
from outer space?
11
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Ha-ha, well, I rather
doubt it, miss.
12
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Bonnie, please hold
the rest of the calls.
13
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I can't talk to all
of Gotham City tonight.
14
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(Bonnie over telephone)
'Yes, commissioner.'
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'But there's a Mrs. Green
here to see you.'
16
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'Regarding a man from Mars
she just met in Gotham Park.'
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Alright, Bonnie.
18
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Wait a minute,
then send her in.
19
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Now let me get
this straight.
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You say by week's end,
the invasion will be complete
21
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and Gotham City
will be overcome
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not only by little
men from Mars
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but by virulent living organisms
from outer space?
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You can't expect me to take you
seriously, Professor Greenleaf.
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I think you should, Ms. Gordon.
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And I think your father
should advise all authorities
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to submit and comply
with the invaders.
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Otherwise..
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- What is it?
- Look.
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'There.'
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[dramatic music]
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[screaming]
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Flying saucers
are a myth.
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A figment of the whole
world's imagination.
35
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But the world's imagination,
and particularly Gotham City's
36
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is getting out of hand.
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What we need..
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...is some experienced help.
39
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[theme music]
40
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¶ Batman
41
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¶ Batman
42
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¶ Batman
43
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¶ Batman
44
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¶ Batman Batman Batman
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¶ Batman Batman Batman
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¶ Na na na na na na
na na na na na na na ¶
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¶ Batman
48
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[dramatic music]
49
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[tires screeching]
50
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But what's this?
51
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In an abandoned
launching pad factory
52
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our old nemesis, the Joker
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up to a sinister
sky borne caper.
54
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Joker, you are so marvey.
55
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Oh, I was more than marvey
while I was in prison, Emerald.
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I was positively inspired.
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Completing these plans
for my flying saucer.
58
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With the help of my cell mate
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a mad scientist who
had a passing penchant
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for picking pockets.
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The plans look great, Joker
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but what are you gonna use
to build it?
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Oh, don't worry about that,
Shamrock. It'll be made.
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And shortly
it'll be speeding
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across the skies
of Gotham City.
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Oh, but not without warning.
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Ooh, the rumors I've planted.
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00:04:02,398 --> 00:04:04,231
Yes, the whispers are flying.
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00:04:04,233 --> 00:04:05,932
What scuttlebutt is afloat
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00:04:05,934 --> 00:04:08,734
on my-on my private grapevine?
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00:04:09,736 --> 00:04:11,436
And..
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...just what did this
man from Mars
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say to you in Gotham park,
Mrs. Green?
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I don't know.
I don't speak Martian
75
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or Marsish
or whatever you call it.
76
00:04:22,481 --> 00:04:24,647
Uh, that's understandable
since there is
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no life on Mars
as we know it.
78
00:04:26,784 --> 00:04:31,319
There can be no intelligible
Marsish language.
79
00:04:31,321 --> 00:04:33,587
Did he threaten you
in any manner?
80
00:04:33,589 --> 00:04:35,455
Well, not exactly threaten me.
81
00:04:35,457 --> 00:04:37,356
But he certainly frightened me.
82
00:04:37,358 --> 00:04:40,559
It's not often
I run into..
83
00:04:40,693 --> 00:04:44,495
It's not often I run into
a man three feet tall.
84
00:04:44,497 --> 00:04:46,330
No, "Three feet tall?"
85
00:04:46,332 --> 00:04:48,598
Holy interplanetary
yardstick.
86
00:04:48,600 --> 00:04:50,566
But he did speak to you?
87
00:04:50,568 --> 00:04:56,004
And then he left in his
flying saucer, Mrs. Green?
88
00:04:57,706 --> 00:05:00,641
He was out of sight
in a split second.
89
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Mother Machree.
90
00:05:02,311 --> 00:05:05,645
Well, I'm sorry to be so
lacking in details, gentlemen
91
00:05:05,647 --> 00:05:08,781
but I thought the incident
should be reported.
92
00:05:08,783 --> 00:05:09,681
Of course, Mrs. Green.
93
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It is the duty of every good
citizen of Gotham City
94
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to report meeting a man
from Mars in a public park.
95
00:05:15,354 --> 00:05:19,255
Gotham City penal code,
section 32, subsection 14.
96
00:05:19,257 --> 00:05:22,258
Yes, thank you
for coming.
97
00:05:23,827 --> 00:05:24,927
You're welcome.
98
00:05:24,929 --> 00:05:26,662
Goodbye, sonny.
99
00:05:28,364 --> 00:05:29,797
Well, Batman.
100
00:05:29,799 --> 00:05:31,031
She seemed composed,
intelligent
101
00:05:31,033 --> 00:05:34,734
not, uh, not given
to falsehoods or hallucinations.
102
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And vaguely familiar,
commissioner.
103
00:05:38,272 --> 00:05:40,038
Perhaps the Bat-computer
104
00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:42,040
can help our
lagging memories.
105
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Let's go, Robin.
106
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Daddy, daddy--
107
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What's the matter, Ms. Gordon?
108
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I barely got out
of the library alive.
109
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There was this little
green man from Mars.
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And he was just scampering
all over the place.
111
00:05:54,285 --> 00:05:56,618
[dramatic music]
112
00:05:58,654 --> 00:06:01,055
But the library isn't
the only place
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00:06:01,057 --> 00:06:04,925
the little green man
is scrambling.
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[engine revving]
115
00:06:28,949 --> 00:06:32,051
And back in the abandoned
launching pad factory..
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And it scared
Commissioner Gordon's daughter
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half to death
in the library?
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Why, your sister Mrs. Green
was equally effective
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at police headquarters.
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Thank you, Professor Greenleaf,
for a job well done.
121
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You've both certainly earned
your greenbacks tonight.
122
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[laughing]
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All of Gotham City has
the flying saucer jitters.
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And when they see
my flying saucer--
125
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How will they
if you haven't made it?
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It can be assembled
in a matter of hours, Shamrock.
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As soon as we
get the beryllium.
128
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What is that, poopsie?
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One of the lightest metals
in the world, Emerald.
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Yes, and the Wayne
Foundation is currently
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doing research on
a huge supply of it.
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So we heist this beryllium
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build you a saucer
and off we go?
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No, Chartreuse.
135
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Here we come
from another planet.
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Yes, terrorizing the inhabitants
of Gotham City
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and forcing them and the rest
of the world's population
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to their knees with
the demands I shall issue
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from my awe-inspiring spaceship.
140
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[chuckling]
141
00:07:29,501 --> 00:07:32,401
What are those demands
going to be, poopsie?
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00:07:32,403 --> 00:07:36,438
Well, what would any green-
haired Martian demand, Emerald.
143
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Complete capitulation, complete
co-operation, complete control.
144
00:07:40,844 --> 00:07:42,643
Now you and Chartreuse
hightail it down
145
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to the metals research wing
of the Wayne Foundation
146
00:07:45,414 --> 00:07:46,813
and pick up that
precious metal.
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00:07:46,815 --> 00:07:49,515
- Oh, and Emerald?
- Yes, poopsie.
148
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You go along
as a decoy
149
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create a
diversionary tactic
150
00:07:52,952 --> 00:07:54,484
just in case millionaire
Bruce Wayne
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or any member of his
staff might be there.
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Groovy, muah, poopsie.
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I'll wait here.
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00:08:01,692 --> 00:08:04,793
If anyone should recognize
me at the Wayne Foundation
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00:08:04,795 --> 00:08:07,829
the dynamic demigods
might be--
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00:08:08,831 --> 00:08:10,398
[laughing]
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00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:11,699
Where have you
been, Verdigris?
158
00:08:11,701 --> 00:08:15,769
Just spreading little bits of
panic here and there, Joker.
159
00:08:15,771 --> 00:08:18,671
And I saw the Batmobile parked
in front of police headquarters
160
00:08:18,673 --> 00:08:22,608
so I placed that little green
timebomb under the dashboard
161
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just like you told me to.
162
00:08:24,445 --> 00:08:26,011
And set it for midnight,
I suppose?
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We Martians like to dispose
of our earthly enemies
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at the witching hour.
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Set for midnight
on the nose, Joker.
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[both laughing]
167
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Mrs. Green.
168
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Greenhorn.
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Greenhouse, green thumb.
170
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- Little green men--
- From Mars.
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00:08:44,795 --> 00:08:47,662
Of course, I remember now.
172
00:08:47,664 --> 00:08:50,064
Mrs. Green used to be
the frontwoman
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for that bunko artist
174
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who at one time
was blackmailing
175
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Green Grocers.
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It's a small world,
isn't it, sir?
177
00:08:56,904 --> 00:08:59,504
It's a small
universe, Alfred.
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00:08:59,506 --> 00:09:02,573
As I suspected from
the beginning, Robin.
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00:09:02,575 --> 00:09:05,576
This present Martian invasion
180
00:09:05,578 --> 00:09:07,945
is all..a hoax.
181
00:09:07,947 --> 00:09:09,146
Including somehow
182
00:09:09,148 --> 00:09:12,984
the little green intruder
in the library.
183
00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:14,285
Now what, Batman?
184
00:09:14,287 --> 00:09:15,853
Well, let's see
what this new
185
00:09:15,855 --> 00:09:19,723
current criminal activity
Bat-disclosure unit
186
00:09:19,725 --> 00:09:21,758
has to disclose.
187
00:09:24,728 --> 00:09:25,828
Joker at large.
188
00:09:25,830 --> 00:09:27,729
Manufacturing a flying saucer.
189
00:09:27,731 --> 00:09:30,598
Gosh, Batman, this machine
is almost human.
190
00:09:30,600 --> 00:09:31,966
But not quite human
enough, Robin.
191
00:09:31,968 --> 00:09:36,904
Just what would Joker be using
to make his flying saucer?
192
00:09:36,906 --> 00:09:39,606
Probably one of
the lighter metals.
193
00:09:39,608 --> 00:09:41,207
Titanium, beryllium.
194
00:09:41,209 --> 00:09:43,242
Titanium.
195
00:09:43,244 --> 00:09:44,643
Titanium?
196
00:09:44,645 --> 00:09:47,912
The supply of Titanium is very
limited in this vicinity.
197
00:09:47,914 --> 00:09:50,180
Yeah, but isn't there
an abundant supply, sir
198
00:09:50,182 --> 00:09:53,216
of beryllium in
the metals research wing
199
00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:54,250
of the Wayne foundation?
200
00:09:54,252 --> 00:09:55,117
Indeed there is, Alfred.
201
00:09:55,119 --> 00:09:57,018
Joker's just clever
enough to know that.
202
00:09:57,020 --> 00:09:59,653
And maybe planning
to appropriate it.
203
00:09:59,655 --> 00:10:02,756
Alfred, there's 15 minutes
until midnight.
204
00:10:02,758 --> 00:10:03,590
I know, sir.
205
00:10:03,592 --> 00:10:04,757
Pay a quick and casual call
206
00:10:04,759 --> 00:10:07,993
on the Wayne Foundation
and check on security there.
207
00:10:07,995 --> 00:10:09,995
Robin and I will follow.
208
00:10:09,997 --> 00:10:13,298
But I do not want
our presence known
209
00:10:13,300 --> 00:10:15,366
until and if
210
00:10:15,368 --> 00:10:18,335
the Joker...plays his hand.
211
00:10:18,337 --> 00:10:19,102
At once, sir.
212
00:10:19,104 --> 00:10:21,337
You know, I find
such an assignment
213
00:10:21,339 --> 00:10:23,339
quite a challenge.
214
00:10:23,341 --> 00:10:26,342
I'll advise
Commissioner Gordon.
215
00:10:26,344 --> 00:10:30,312
If our suspicions
are right, old chum
216
00:10:30,314 --> 00:10:33,815
the Joker's terrorizing
Gotham City
217
00:10:33,817 --> 00:10:36,250
will be stopped at once.
218
00:10:38,653 --> 00:10:40,186
Yes, Batman?
219
00:10:40,188 --> 00:10:41,820
The Joker?
220
00:10:41,822 --> 00:10:43,688
The Wayne Foundation?
221
00:10:43,690 --> 00:10:45,823
And you'll handle it yourself?
222
00:10:45,825 --> 00:10:48,025
Well, keep me informed, Batman.
223
00:10:48,027 --> 00:10:50,827
I'll send you any help you need.
224
00:10:50,829 --> 00:10:52,895
Right.
225
00:10:53,897 --> 00:10:56,865
What was that
all about, commissioner?
226
00:10:56,867 --> 00:10:59,701
Well, Batman has
reason to believe
227
00:10:59,703 --> 00:11:02,236
the Joker is behind
this so-called
228
00:11:02,238 --> 00:11:04,371
imminent Martian invasion.
229
00:11:04,373 --> 00:11:06,172
He also suspects
the next development
230
00:11:06,174 --> 00:11:09,175
will take place in
the metals research wing
231
00:11:09,177 --> 00:11:10,409
of the Wayne Foundation.
232
00:11:10,411 --> 00:11:12,744
[dramatic music]
233
00:11:13,345 --> 00:11:16,013
So on a night filled
with incredible happenings
234
00:11:16,015 --> 00:11:19,950
Barbara Gordon makes her own
incredible change into Batgirl
235
00:11:19,952 --> 00:11:23,853
as the witching hour
arrives in the Bat-cave.
236
00:11:23,855 --> 00:11:26,222
Alfred should be
on his way by now.
237
00:11:26,224 --> 00:11:28,257
To the Batmobile.
238
00:11:34,697 --> 00:11:37,098
[loud explosion]
239
00:11:40,068 --> 00:11:41,802
[dramatic music]
240
00:11:44,906 --> 00:11:46,940
[laughing]
241
00:11:46,942 --> 00:11:47,974
What a coup.
242
00:11:47,976 --> 00:11:50,009
What an incredible coup.
243
00:11:50,011 --> 00:11:52,444
[laughing hysterically]
244
00:11:53,212 --> 00:11:55,179
Well, a mad scientist
245
00:11:55,181 --> 00:11:57,414
to help us assemble
my flying saucer.
246
00:11:57,416 --> 00:12:00,049
- If I may correct you--
- You may not correct me.
247
00:12:00,051 --> 00:12:04,086
I know a mad scientist
when I see a mad scientist.
248
00:12:04,088 --> 00:12:06,922
Tell us why you were at
the metal research wing
249
00:12:06,924 --> 00:12:10,125
of the Wayne Foundation
when my men caught you
250
00:12:10,127 --> 00:12:11,459
along with Batgirl
251
00:12:11,461 --> 00:12:13,961
caught coming in a window.
252
00:12:13,963 --> 00:12:17,364
Maybe we should find her
a window in the sky.
253
00:12:17,366 --> 00:12:19,766
You mean, put her
in orbit, Joker?
254
00:12:19,768 --> 00:12:20,433
'Exactly, Shamrock.'
255
00:12:20,435 --> 00:12:23,469
Just as we're gonna put my
flying saucer in orbit.
256
00:12:23,471 --> 00:12:25,270
Yes, with the help
of this huge
257
00:12:25,272 --> 00:12:27,472
supply of beryllium
you heisted.
258
00:12:27,474 --> 00:12:32,777
And all done with no sign
of Batman or Robin at all.
259
00:12:33,411 --> 00:12:37,480
Of course, there's no sign
of Batman and Robin, Joker.
260
00:12:37,914 --> 00:12:40,815
Where have you been
this time, Verdigris?
261
00:12:40,817 --> 00:12:42,950
Spreading more panic, Joker.
262
00:12:42,952 --> 00:12:44,318
Police headquarters
is in turmoil.
263
00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:47,788
And the Batmobile is gone
from where it was last parked.
264
00:12:47,790 --> 00:12:49,890
And so are
the caped cadavers.
265
00:12:49,892 --> 00:12:50,490
Gone forever, Joker.
266
00:12:50,492 --> 00:12:52,792
Thanks to that little green
timebomb I planted.
267
00:12:52,794 --> 00:12:57,062
Oh, joy of joys.
Ecstasy of ecstasy.
268
00:12:57,064 --> 00:12:58,196
[Joker laughing]
269
00:12:58,198 --> 00:13:00,965
You suppose there's a
working launching pad left
270
00:13:00,967 --> 00:13:03,100
in this abandoned
launching pad factory?
271
00:13:03,102 --> 00:13:04,901
Yes, there's one
in the launching pad
272
00:13:04,903 --> 00:13:06,502
equipment locker, Joker,
and some fuse.
273
00:13:06,504 --> 00:13:09,905
Oh, good, while the countdown
begins for Batgirl
274
00:13:09,907 --> 00:13:13,808
our mad captive scientist
will unpack the beryllium
275
00:13:13,810 --> 00:13:16,510
and then help me assemble
my flying saucer.
276
00:13:16,512 --> 00:13:21,181
While back in
the battered Bat-cave.
277
00:13:21,382 --> 00:13:22,949
[Batman grunts]
278
00:13:22,951 --> 00:13:24,216
[Robin grunting]
279
00:13:24,218 --> 00:13:27,886
Batman? Batman?
280
00:13:29,154 --> 00:13:31,855
Batman, where are you?
281
00:13:31,857 --> 00:13:34,757
Batman, where are you?
282
00:13:34,759 --> 00:13:36,825
Up here, old chum.
283
00:13:36,959 --> 00:13:40,795
Boy, I'd say we had
ourselves a little blast.
284
00:13:40,797 --> 00:13:43,030
I'd say we had
ourselves one of..
285
00:13:43,032 --> 00:13:44,831
...Joker's lethal timebombs
286
00:13:44,833 --> 00:13:48,768
no doubt planted by one
of his men from Mars.
287
00:13:51,938 --> 00:13:53,338
[coughing]
288
00:13:53,340 --> 00:13:55,940
Holy rock garden!
289
00:13:58,910 --> 00:14:00,977
Look, the clock didn't break.
290
00:14:00,979 --> 00:14:01,844
'It's almost 8:30.'
291
00:14:01,846 --> 00:14:04,146
We've been out cold
over eight hours.
292
00:14:04,148 --> 00:14:07,215
And apparently so
has Alfred been out.
293
00:14:07,217 --> 00:14:08,883
At the Wayne Foundation
294
00:14:08,885 --> 00:14:10,484
where Joker and his
little green menaces
295
00:14:10,486 --> 00:14:11,918
were going to steal
our beryllium.
296
00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:15,888
Do you suppose Alfred has tried
to get in contact with us?
297
00:14:15,890 --> 00:14:19,191
Every receiving device
around here has been broken.
298
00:14:19,193 --> 00:14:22,194
And by all rights,
so should we have been.
299
00:14:22,196 --> 00:14:22,961
Sure, Batman.
300
00:14:22,963 --> 00:14:26,264
If it hadn't been for our
anti-thermal Bat-T-shirts
301
00:14:26,266 --> 00:14:27,565
we've been wearing lately.
302
00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:30,034
And look, the explosion
even knocked out--
303
00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:32,469
Knocked all the phones
off the hooks.
304
00:14:32,471 --> 00:14:34,137
Yeah.
305
00:14:36,106 --> 00:14:37,072
Hello.
306
00:14:37,074 --> 00:14:41,109
Oh, there's-there's no more
current, Robin.
307
00:14:41,111 --> 00:14:41,876
Quickly, old chum
308
00:14:41,878 --> 00:14:44,345
we must rig up an
auxiliary circuit
309
00:14:44,347 --> 00:14:46,480
Bat-regenerator.
310
00:14:46,814 --> 00:14:50,583
Who knows what's happened
to the outside world.
311
00:14:55,855 --> 00:14:56,354
[sighing]
312
00:14:56,356 --> 00:15:00,524
Who knows what's happened
to the caped crusaders?
313
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:05,995
I can't seem to locate
them anywhere, Mayor Linseed.
314
00:15:05,997 --> 00:15:09,898
Do you expect me to report
that to Governor Stone, fella?
315
00:15:09,900 --> 00:15:12,200
To the president?
Londinium?
316
00:15:12,202 --> 00:15:13,167
To the United Nations?
317
00:15:13,169 --> 00:15:15,335
This is an emergency,
commissioner.
318
00:15:15,337 --> 00:15:17,203
Flying saucers
and men from Mars
319
00:15:17,205 --> 00:15:18,304
don't invade
our country every day.
320
00:15:18,306 --> 00:15:22,074
Well, at least they've stopped
invading for a minute.
321
00:15:22,076 --> 00:15:24,976
The sky is as clear
as a dye.
322
00:15:24,978 --> 00:15:25,476
"Dye?"
323
00:15:25,478 --> 00:15:27,945
A very poor choice
of words, Chief O'Hara.
324
00:15:27,947 --> 00:15:31,248
That's what we may all be doing
if the Martians return.
325
00:15:31,250 --> 00:15:35,018
Dying, if we can't find
Batman and Robin.
326
00:15:35,020 --> 00:15:37,453
Not to mention Batgirl.
327
00:15:38,421 --> 00:15:41,423
But to mention Batgirl.
328
00:15:41,425 --> 00:15:43,525
[Joker laughing]
329
00:15:44,326 --> 00:15:45,926
This is a unique experience.
330
00:15:45,928 --> 00:15:47,494
I've thrilled many
a woman, Batgirl
331
00:15:47,496 --> 00:15:51,164
but I've never sent one
completely in orbit before.
332
00:15:51,166 --> 00:15:51,898
[laughing]
333
00:15:51,900 --> 00:15:54,233
Well, you shall have
company shortly though.
334
00:15:54,235 --> 00:15:57,169
Now that my flying saucer
is completed.
335
00:15:57,171 --> 00:16:00,405
Yes, we will take off
immediately after you do.
336
00:16:00,407 --> 00:16:02,373
And we'll wave to you
occasionally
337
00:16:02,375 --> 00:16:04,942
as we pass you
circling the Earth.
338
00:16:04,944 --> 00:16:05,442
[laughing]
339
00:16:05,444 --> 00:16:07,377
Of course, you will
keep going forever.
340
00:16:07,379 --> 00:16:09,946
While we circle the Earth
a few more times
341
00:16:09,948 --> 00:16:13,115
to give everyone a good
look at my saucer
342
00:16:13,117 --> 00:16:15,550
as they await my
ultimate ultimatum
343
00:16:15,552 --> 00:16:19,220
in fear and trembling
before I return
344
00:16:19,222 --> 00:16:20,521
ruler of the universe.
345
00:16:20,523 --> 00:16:21,421
[Joker laughing]
346
00:16:21,423 --> 00:16:24,190
This may be my last attempt
to reach you, sir.
347
00:16:24,192 --> 00:16:26,659
'Though I've been trying
desperately for hours.'
348
00:16:26,661 --> 00:16:27,559
It works, it's Alfred.
349
00:16:27,561 --> 00:16:30,428
(Alfred)
'The Joker's about to put
Batgirl into orbit'
350
00:16:30,430 --> 00:16:33,431
from the abandoned
launching pad factory
351
00:16:33,433 --> 00:16:35,666
on Flying Circus Hill.
352
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:39,469
Are you talking
to that handkerchief?
353
00:16:40,604 --> 00:16:42,905
Just dabbing my eyes.
354
00:16:42,907 --> 00:16:45,274
Stronger men
than I have wept..
355
00:16:45,276 --> 00:16:49,311
'...at moments like this.'
356
00:16:49,313 --> 00:16:51,513
Oh.
357
00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:57,017
And then he's about to
launch his own flying saucer.
358
00:16:57,019 --> 00:17:00,420
Holy known unknown
flying objects.
359
00:17:00,422 --> 00:17:01,020
What?
360
00:17:01,022 --> 00:17:03,922
Holy known unknown
flying objects.
361
00:17:03,924 --> 00:17:07,992
Robin, alert the Bat-copter port
to ready the Bat-copter.
362
00:17:07,994 --> 00:17:10,627
While I tell Commissioner Gordon
that communications
363
00:17:10,629 --> 00:17:13,430
have been reestablished.
364
00:17:13,432 --> 00:17:16,299
Ten, nine, eight, seven
365
00:17:16,301 --> 00:17:19,235
'six, five four, three'
366
00:17:19,237 --> 00:17:22,404
two, one, blastoff.
367
00:17:23,672 --> 00:17:26,106
[fuse sputtering]
368
00:17:30,311 --> 00:17:32,078
The fuse has gone out.
369
00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:32,778
[chuckling]
370
00:17:32,780 --> 00:17:34,746
That's right, Joker.
It's out.
371
00:17:34,748 --> 00:17:38,649
The automatic fuse extinguisher
in my Batgirl utility belt
372
00:17:38,651 --> 00:17:42,653
will forever keep you
from putting me into orbit.
373
00:17:42,655 --> 00:17:43,520
Oh, untie her.
374
00:17:43,522 --> 00:17:45,722
We'll take her
in the flying saucer.
375
00:17:45,724 --> 00:17:48,124
'And the mad scientist too.'
376
00:17:48,126 --> 00:17:50,693
While I push the button
that opens the roof
377
00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:52,795
'of this launching pad factory.'
378
00:17:52,797 --> 00:17:55,430
[explosion]
379
00:17:55,432 --> 00:17:57,765
[laughing]
380
00:18:01,836 --> 00:18:04,704
I don't understand
your language too well, sir
381
00:18:04,706 --> 00:18:07,206
but I assume you're
trying to tell me
382
00:18:07,208 --> 00:18:10,409
the flying saucer
is over Petronaviscoff?
383
00:18:10,543 --> 00:18:15,346
Oh-oh, was over Petronaviscoff
three seconds ago.
384
00:18:15,348 --> 00:18:18,148
Well, thank you, sir,
for calling.
385
00:18:18,150 --> 00:18:18,781
[chuckling]
386
00:18:18,783 --> 00:18:23,385
That was the First
Minister of the Presidio.
387
00:18:23,387 --> 00:18:24,252
Barbara.
388
00:18:24,254 --> 00:18:25,219
- What?
- What?
389
00:18:25,221 --> 00:18:27,821
I said, Barbara, my daughter.
390
00:18:27,823 --> 00:18:33,193
I wonder what's happened to her
in all this excitement.
391
00:18:33,827 --> 00:18:34,560
[dramatic music]
392
00:18:34,562 --> 00:18:37,763
And well might
Commissioner Gordon wonder
393
00:18:37,765 --> 00:18:40,365
what's happened
to his daughter.
394
00:18:40,367 --> 00:18:41,499
[laughing]
395
00:18:41,501 --> 00:18:44,101
Oh, look.
Right over there.
396
00:18:44,103 --> 00:18:47,437
Just a few billion
miles, Saturn.
397
00:18:47,439 --> 00:18:48,137
[laughing]
398
00:18:48,139 --> 00:18:51,106
How did you get mixed up in
something like this, Alfred?
399
00:18:51,108 --> 00:18:54,209
My job as millionaire
Bruce Wayne's butler
400
00:18:54,211 --> 00:18:57,212
sometimes calls for
extracurricular duties.
401
00:18:57,214 --> 00:19:01,149
but this-this is
going too far.
402
00:19:01,450 --> 00:19:03,184
Activate the
supersonic decelerating
403
00:19:03,186 --> 00:19:04,785
counter-rotating
turbines, Verdigris.
404
00:19:04,787 --> 00:19:08,789
We're getting a little
too close to the sun.
405
00:19:09,891 --> 00:19:12,559
While back on Earth..
406
00:19:12,561 --> 00:19:14,127
[theme music]
407
00:19:14,129 --> 00:19:16,229
[tires screeching]
408
00:19:22,236 --> 00:19:25,538
Well, now we've seen
New Auckland.
409
00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:27,439
Invert the compression
radial ratio
410
00:19:27,441 --> 00:19:29,641
energize the tandem elronds,
Verdigris.
411
00:19:29,643 --> 00:19:33,511
while I turn up this
inter-planetary microphone.
412
00:19:33,513 --> 00:19:36,547
In 46.38 seconds,
we'll be over Gotham City
413
00:19:36,549 --> 00:19:40,551
where I will ultimate
my ultimatum.
414
00:19:43,655 --> 00:19:44,821
Me, me.
415
00:19:44,823 --> 00:19:47,890
'Me, me, me, me, yes.'
416
00:19:47,892 --> 00:19:48,891
Whoo.
417
00:19:48,893 --> 00:19:50,492
It sure beats walking.
418
00:19:50,494 --> 00:19:52,393
- Any sightings?
- None.
419
00:19:52,395 --> 00:19:54,361
(Robin)
'But if Alfred's
on that flying saucer'
420
00:19:54,363 --> 00:19:58,365
'maybe we can reach him on our
inter-cosmic thermo-phone.'
421
00:19:59,767 --> 00:20:01,801
[beeping]
422
00:20:05,639 --> 00:20:07,306
I hear you, sir.
423
00:20:07,308 --> 00:20:09,508
Head straight for
Flying Circus Hill.
424
00:20:09,510 --> 00:20:11,710
(Batman)
'Flying Circus Hill?'
425
00:20:11,712 --> 00:20:15,947
We're just entering the sub
stratosphere over Gotham City.
426
00:20:15,949 --> 00:20:18,249
I managed to put some
homing beryl
427
00:20:18,251 --> 00:20:22,319
into the beryllium this
flying saucer is made off.
428
00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:23,520
It should head straight back.
429
00:20:23,522 --> 00:20:26,723
Are you talking to your
handkerchief again?
430
00:20:28,592 --> 00:20:30,826
Just clearing my head.
431
00:20:30,828 --> 00:20:32,961
Altitude, you know.
432
00:20:34,563 --> 00:20:35,529
Oh.
433
00:20:35,531 --> 00:20:36,630
(Robin)
'Good old Alfred.'
434
00:20:36,632 --> 00:20:39,466
(Batman)
'Yes, I'll head for
Flying Circus Hill.'
435
00:20:39,468 --> 00:20:40,834
'You alert Commissioner Gordon.'
436
00:20:40,836 --> 00:20:43,203
[dramatic music]
437
00:20:44,605 --> 00:20:45,237
[laughing]
438
00:20:45,239 --> 00:20:49,341
It's time for my
ultimate ultimatum.
439
00:20:49,343 --> 00:20:51,309
Hear this.
Now hear this.
440
00:20:51,311 --> 00:20:55,279
(Joker on loudspeaker)
'All citizens of Gotham City'
441
00:20:55,281 --> 00:20:56,313
'and the world.'
442
00:20:56,315 --> 00:21:00,583
'This is the Joker speaking
to you from outer space.'
443
00:21:00,585 --> 00:21:02,585
From inner outer space.
444
00:21:02,587 --> 00:21:04,486
[laughing]
445
00:21:04,488 --> 00:21:06,754
Yes, advising you to--
446
00:21:06,756 --> 00:21:08,222
[beeping]
447
00:21:08,224 --> 00:21:09,489
What's the matter, Verdigris?
448
00:21:09,491 --> 00:21:11,858
We've passed the city.
449
00:21:12,593 --> 00:21:14,894
We're headed right back
to Flying Circus Hill
450
00:21:14,896 --> 00:21:18,264
'and the abandoned
launching pad factory.'
451
00:21:18,266 --> 00:21:20,599
Depress the aerothermic
thermal reso-ducts
452
00:21:20,601 --> 00:21:25,570
Accelerate the isothermal
oxy-acetylene vaporometers.
453
00:21:25,572 --> 00:21:26,971
Huh?
454
00:21:26,973 --> 00:21:28,572
Step on the gas.
455
00:21:28,574 --> 00:21:30,640
This thingamajig
is stuck here.
456
00:21:30,642 --> 00:21:34,577
But we're headed right
back where we started.
457
00:21:38,014 --> 00:21:40,482
Oh-oh..
458
00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:55,763
Well, at least it was
a soft landing, poopsie.
459
00:21:55,765 --> 00:21:57,498
Yes, but on
the wrong planet.
460
00:21:57,500 --> 00:21:59,666
I wanted to rule
the world from Mars.
461
00:21:59,668 --> 00:22:01,501
I like the looks
of that place.
462
00:22:01,503 --> 00:22:02,835
Yes, you'll be
more comfortable
463
00:22:02,837 --> 00:22:05,771
there at the moment, Joker.
464
00:22:15,481 --> 00:22:17,849
[grunting]
465
00:22:33,732 --> 00:22:35,833
[music continues]
466
00:22:49,414 --> 00:22:50,947
[punching]
467
00:23:06,029 --> 00:23:08,930
Alright, boys,
round 'em up.
468
00:23:16,371 --> 00:23:18,672
Joker, it looks like you've
flown your last saucer.
469
00:23:18,674 --> 00:23:21,675
But I came close, Batman.
I came close.
470
00:23:21,677 --> 00:23:22,642
Close doesn't count.
471
00:23:22,644 --> 00:23:25,811
You'll come much closer
to washing tin saucers
472
00:23:25,813 --> 00:23:29,014
up at Warden Crichton's
Cosmic Calaboose, Joker.
473
00:23:29,016 --> 00:23:30,949
Let's go.
474
00:23:32,952 --> 00:23:36,120
(Commissioner Gordon)
'Barbara, where have you been?'
475
00:23:36,122 --> 00:23:37,688
Looking all over
for you, daddy.
476
00:23:37,690 --> 00:23:40,023
Bonnie said I might
find you in here.
477
00:23:40,025 --> 00:23:41,991
I took an unexpected little trip
478
00:23:41,993 --> 00:23:45,594
and I didn't have time
to let you know.
479
00:23:52,134 --> 00:23:55,970
Well, at least the Joker's
Martian invasion
480
00:23:55,972 --> 00:23:57,671
has been grounded.
481
00:23:57,673 --> 00:24:01,441
For five to ten years,
I would imagine.
482
00:24:01,443 --> 00:24:03,676
[Bat-phone beeping]
483
00:24:04,844 --> 00:24:06,878
Yes, commissioner.
484
00:24:07,779 --> 00:24:10,847
Spiffany's jewelry store?
485
00:24:12,416 --> 00:24:14,450
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
486
00:24:14,452 --> 00:24:17,486
What do these window
shoppers look like?
487
00:24:18,654 --> 00:24:20,888
What do they look like?
488
00:24:20,890 --> 00:24:23,090
Who could possibly describe
489
00:24:23,092 --> 00:24:26,493
Dr. Cassandra
and her husband Cabala
490
00:24:26,495 --> 00:24:31,898
eyeing the priceless
Mope diamond hungrily
491
00:24:31,900 --> 00:24:32,798
and then disappearing?
492
00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:35,534
No wonder all of Gotham City
is startled
493
00:24:35,536 --> 00:24:39,871
as you are bound to be
in our next episode.
494
00:24:42,074 --> 00:24:44,708
[theme music]
495
00:24:44,710 --> 00:24:47,077
¶ Batman
496
00:24:47,878 --> 00:24:50,012
¶ Batman
497
00:24:50,913 --> 00:24:53,047
¶ Batman
498
00:24:54,115 --> 00:24:56,449
¶ Batman
499
00:24:57,150 --> 00:25:01,920
¶ Batman Batman Batman
500
00:25:04,823 --> 00:25:07,591
¶ Na na na na na na na na na
501
00:25:07,593 --> 00:25:10,493
¶ Batman