¶ Batman
(male narrator) When we last glimpsed the masked man-hunter
he was about to be snapped to death
by a gigantic bat-trap.
And a poor, drugged Robin
as the unwitting tool of his destruction.
Batman's only hope is to join forces with Catwoman.
But we know he won't do that.
Or will he?
The incredible answer in just one moment.
[theme music]
¶ Batman
¶ Na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na ¶
¶ Batman
[dramatic music]
[snap]
Have you reached a verdict?
You win, Catwoman.
I'll become your partner.
But it's not that I'm afraid to die.
I just don't want a murder rap hanging over Robin's young head.
Robin..
...stop sawing.
You realize I'll have to drug you with Cataphrenic
to make sure you're not faking.
Of course, Catwoman.
I wouldn't expect you to believe me.
There's no honor among thieves, Batman.
- I'll buy that. - Hmm.
Cataphrenic.
I..
D-do you mind if I..
...take a Bat-pill first?
Catwoman, I feel a headache coming on.
I feel a little...woozy.
Would you like some chicken soup?
No, thank you. I think a Bat-pill will do.
It's not that serious.
You men are all hypochondriacs.
Alright, go ahead.
Now..
...do with me as you like.
Hey.
You're a..
..pretty good looker.
You got some, uh..
..class, baby.
Who are you?
I'm your boss.
Yeah.
Don't forget it. Alright boys, let's go.
We've got some money to count.
Yeah, let's go. Let's go.
Nine hundred and ninety nine thousand.
Ninety eight. Ninety nine. One million.
Hey, hey. That's a neat haul, Cat-baby.
Only the beginning.
Drop in the proverbial bucket.
We're gonna live it up. We're gonna whale, doll.
Nope. This money goes toward buying plans
of the Gotham City Mint.
The mint? You don't fool around.
Which way, sweetheart?
Drive straight out along Short Island Sound
to the Old Criminal's Home.
Oh, would I love to see Commissioner Gordon's face now.
[laughs]
Incredible. I don't believe it.
Two of me men saw it with their own four eyes.
Catwoman riding in the Batmobile with Batman.
They came off the bridge and disappeared in the traffic.
The worst has come to pass.
Send out an all-points bulletin, Chief O'Hara.
Wanted, dead or alive..
...Batman, Robin, Catwoman and Pussycat.
Ah, you young criminals, you don't know what it's all about.
- Back in the good old days-- - Stall the gabbin', Little Al.
Crime's come a long way since you operated.
Yeah-yeah, here's the million, Little Al.
Oh, thanks, fellow. What did you say your name was?
Quit yapping, and give us the plans to the mint.
Shh!
Not so loud.
There are a lot of very dishonest persons in here.
We're all retired gangsters, you know.
Legs Zerkin, Frank Nitti-Gritti..
Give us the envelope, please.
Criminals just ain't genteel anymore.
Ah, the plans are all here. Good. Great.
Where to now, Cat-baby?
We'll have to lay low at the Cat-lair until it gets dark.
Robin and Pussycat are there already.
We're gonna drive East on Beacon
till we get to the French quarter.
It's at 13 Rue Madeleine.
[telephone rings]
Yes.
Mayor Linseed, we're doing all we can.
[telephone rings]
Hello.
Certainly, I have all my men on it, Governor Stonefellow.
As soon as there's any break in the case, I'll call you back.
[telephone rings]
Gordon! Ah!
Y-yes! Yes, I-I will, sir.
Yes, it is terrible.
Uh..
My best to Hubert.
An anonymous tip just came into the switchboard
with the address of the Cat-lair.
- Should we follow it up? - Let's go.
¶ Maybe now
¶ All the gray has gone away
¶ Maybe now
¶ We'll find a way
¶ To grow from day to day
¶ Loving with the love
¶ You say is here to stay
¶ I will try
¶ To meet my vow
¶ Take my hand and show me how
¶ Turn the key and we may see love ¶
¶ Maybe now
Agh!
Oh.
Come on, baby. Did you miss me?
Well..
You still madly in love with me? Huh?
- Well.. - Ah.
How about a little smooch? You're my kinda dame.
I hardly even know you, Robin.
Kissing is a great way to get acquainted, sweetheart.
But, Robin, I wouldn't want you get the wrong impression of me.
I'm not the type of girl to kiss a boy on the first crime.
Close your eyes and pucker.
And don't worry about your reputation.
Hands up! Don't make a move.
- Holy shucks! - You are under arrest.
May I change into my streets clothes before we go?
Oh, alright, go ahead, but hurry.
How could they have known the location of my Cat-lair?
Beats me, Cat-baby.
What's new, Catwoman?
Meet us at the mint at five in the morning.
Lay low until then, Mr. Spade.
Right.
We are gonna have to find a place to hide out, Batman.
Do you remember the way back to the Bat-cave?
Bat-cave? What's a Bat-cave?
Concentrate, Batman. Perhaps you can remember where it is.
Yeah. Yeah, I think, I remember.
Yeah, that's it, Bat-cave.
What's that?
Just a little Bat-sleep, Catwoman.
Twenty winks or so.
My name is Pussycat.
My rank is criminal. Second class.
I have no serial number.
Now, if you want any more information, flatfoot
see my mouthpiece.
It's no use, O'Hara. She won't crack.
What she needs is a good slap on the wrist.
That's enough!
You know, I'm violently opposed to police brutality.
Well, then, how are we gonna find Batman?
Oh! I have an idea.
How do we usually find Batman?
Call him on the Bat-phone.
Correct. Now, what would happen if we were to trace the line
attached to the Bat-phone?
Brilliant, commissioner!
What happened?
You fainted in my arms.
Oh! Maybe I should take more Cat-naps.
Fantastic!
What a base of operations!
Yeah, it's a nice little pad, Cat-baby.
Ah!
Oh, Batman, this is wonderful!
You and me.
And our own private paradise.
Sounds swinging.
[laughs]
Yeah, and Gotham City will swing at our mercy.
Is there something, you'd like to do, Batman?
Yeah, I..
I got your message, Catwoman.
Isn't there something that you wanna do?
Now that we're standing
almost mask to mask this way?
Sure, Catwoman.
But first we got the...heist at the mint to think about.
Caped crime fighter to caped crook.
[Batalarm ringing]
What's going on?
Someone's trying to trace a Bat-phone line to the Bat-cave.
Can they do that?
If I let 'em. It's been tried before.
But I'm not gonna let.
There. That oughta throw 'em off the track for a while, Cat-baby.
Meanwhile, back in the rundown apartment
of the world's richest and cheapest inventor, Pat Pending.
One million seven hundred thousand
nine hundred and forty eight.
One mill..
Stay right where you are, Batman.
Batman? Is-is Batman here?
That's right, and you're he, uh, him, Batman.
Me? Batman?
[laughing]
With this paunch? Ho-ho.
You are very clever, Batman.
Judging by your physical appearance
I'd never guess your secret.
But the Bat-phone line lead us right to you.
Dah! This is some sort of trick on Batman's part.
I'll say it is.
And where is Rudy, your valet?
Gone to market.
Correction. We have him in police headquarters
in his guise as Robin, the Boy Wonder.
[laughing]
That's ridiculous!
Rudy is 32 years old.
And obviously very spry for his age.
Come on, Batman, it's all over.
- Oh, wait a minute. - Come on.
You'll hear from my lawyer about this.
I counted that money. I know how much is there.
[Batmobile speeds away]
"Dear, Alfred.
"Deliver these Bat-antidote pills
"to Robin at police headquarters.
Then have him meet me.."
Hm-mm. Ha!
Good show, sir.
It's 5 o'clock in the morning
and all is not well at the Gotham City Mint.
It's cold.
Here, you want my...cape around you?
I prefer your arms around me.
[car door shuts]
We're ready when you are, Catwoman.
Your timing's incredible!
Alright. Let's get on with it.
Now.
Here's the secret entrance to the place.
We're standing in front of the rear door.
And the entrance is four feet to the left.
I don't see anything, Catwoman.
You're not suppose to. That's the idea.
Hammer.
Get back.
Get back!
Get down.
It's a new explosive that makes no noise.
It's called silentmite.
Spade, Marlow, Templar, fill up those sacks with money.
Don't take anything under a nickel.
Hello, Catwoman.
Robin, you escaped.
- A lucky star is above. - But not for you.
I'm no longer under the influence
of Cataphrenic, Catwoman.
I'm back to my old, young crime-fighting self.
Batman, punch him, kick him.
Do something.
No.
Catwoman, you've been hoist on your own petard.
I took a universal Bat-antidote
before you administered that dreadful drug.
I never was under your spell, I was...merely acting.
But I had to find the chink in the armor of the mint
which I have.
Men, dispense with them quickly.
- She's gone! - But where?
Batman, Robin, forgive my ever doubting you--
There's no time for that now, commissioner.
The question is, have you seen Catwoman?
- I did, Caped Crusader. - Where?
Just pulled away in the Batmobile.
(Batman and Robin) The Batmobile!
She must have taken the key to the ignition
while my mind was on something else.
Holy diversionary tactic!
There is one way we can catch her, Robin.
Chief O'Hara, may I have the keys to your patrol car?
- Are you insured? - Give him the keys, O'Hara.
Yes, sir.
No ordinary car can catch the Batmobile.
Absolutely correct, Robin.
Excuse me.
We'll never catch her, Batman.
Not as long as she keeps going in the Batmobile's top speed.
She's heading for the piers at New Guernsey.
- Here, take this. - A remote control apparatus.
Why didn't I think of that?
A device to manipulate the Batmobile.
The red button's for the brakes, the white is for acceleration.
And the green button will turn the car..
...a la izquierda o a la derecha.
To the left or right.
Threw in a little Spanish on me, huh, Batman?
One should always keep abreast of foreign tongues, Robin.
[click]
Must be running out of fuel.
Can you see her?
Yes. Just up ahead.
There she is, amigo.
Catwoman. Come down.
You'll have to come up and get me, Batman.
What now, mon ami?
You heard what she said, Robin. You stay where you are.
I'll take care of this.
(Robin) 'Go, get her, Batman!'
Get her!
You're running out of room, Catwoman.
You'd better come down.
[hissing] S-sorry, Batman
but all my systems are go!
Give up, Catwoman. There's no exit.
You'll never catch me alive!
Ha-ha!
[laughing]
Aah!
- It's all over, Catwoman. - I could swim for it.
You'd never survive the fall.
It's at least a 100 feet down into the West river.
Anything's better than facing prison again.
I'll do everything I can to rehabilitate you.
Marry me.
Everything except that.
A wife, no matter how beauteous or affectionate
would severely impair my crime fighting.
But I can help you in your work.
As a former criminal I'd be invaluable.
I can reform, honestly I can.
What about Robin?
Robin?
Oh, I've got it. We'll kill him.
I see you're not really ready to assume a life in society.
I guess you're right, Batman.
Can't teach an old cat new tricks.
Give me your hand.
Alright, now get movin', get movin', all of ya.
The paddy wagon is waitin' for ya.
Come on.
My deepest regrets
for ever questioning your actions, Batman.
Accepted, Commissioner Gordon.
You couldn't have possibly known that my plan was
to let Catwoman play out her hand.
Ah, yes, Catwoman, an evil genius.
Do you remember anything of your association with her?
It's all a blur. Like a horrible daymare.
I don't think she'll be bothering us anymore.
You're probably right, as usual, Batman.
Although we've found no trace of her body
I can't conceive of anyone living after a fall
from the top of a building like that into West river.
And yet, I can't help thinking that
somewhere in that great Cat-lair
in the sky she's looking down
and laughing at us.
I feel the same way, Batman.
She made good her threat never again to return to prison.
Even though it cost her her life!
Or at least one of her lives.
Tomorrow, another Batman special.
The Penguin and Marsha, Queen of Diamonds
versus the Caped Crusaders
in the first of three exciting parts.
Same Bat-time, same Bat-channel.
[theme music]
¶ Batman
¶ Na-na na-na na-na na-na na
¶ Batman