1 00:02:50,375 --> 00:02:51,957 Who are you? 2 00:02:52,291 --> 00:02:55,457 I'm your husband. Ben. 3 00:02:56,541 --> 00:02:57,957 What? 4 00:02:58,583 --> 00:03:00,415 We got married in 1999. 5 00:03:01,708 --> 00:03:03,124 That's 14 years ago. 6 00:03:03,375 --> 00:03:04,790 Uh... 7 00:03:05,083 --> 00:03:07,082 Christine, you're 40. 8 00:03:23,791 --> 00:03:25,624 You had an accident. 9 00:03:26,541 --> 00:03:29,624 It was a bad accident. You had head injuries. 10 00:03:30,958 --> 00:03:32,665 And you have problems remembering things. 11 00:03:33,666 --> 00:03:35,790 What things? What... 12 00:03:36,541 --> 00:03:39,665 Everything. You store up information for a day 13 00:03:40,083 --> 00:03:41,999 and when you wake up in the morning, it's all gone, 14 00:03:42,083 --> 00:03:43,874 you're back to your early 20s. 15 00:03:51,916 --> 00:03:53,499 It'll be okay. 16 00:03:54,458 --> 00:03:56,457 Just... trust me. 17 00:03:56,541 --> 00:03:58,082 - I'm scared. - I know. 18 00:03:58,166 --> 00:03:59,665 I know, it's all right. 19 00:04:00,875 --> 00:04:02,290 I love you. 20 00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:11,874 I love you, Christine. 21 00:04:15,583 --> 00:04:17,665 We've been married for 14 years. 22 00:04:18,958 --> 00:04:21,165 We met during your last term at King's. 23 00:04:21,708 --> 00:04:23,124 You were doing an MA in History 24 00:04:23,208 --> 00:04:25,165 and we got married a couple of years after that. 25 00:04:25,250 --> 00:04:26,999 I'd have been perfectly happy with the registry office... 26 00:04:27,083 --> 00:04:30,457 but you wanted a white wedding. 27 00:04:30,541 --> 00:04:32,790 I hated every moment of it 28 00:04:33,250 --> 00:04:35,457 until I saw you walking down the aisle. 29 00:04:35,541 --> 00:04:37,165 Is every day like this? 30 00:04:39,208 --> 00:04:40,874 Is every day the same? 31 00:04:42,958 --> 00:04:45,790 That's just a list of everything you might need. 32 00:04:46,291 --> 00:04:47,707 And where you'll find it. 33 00:04:47,791 --> 00:04:50,290 Aspirin, first aid, sanitary towels, toiletries. 34 00:04:50,375 --> 00:04:52,207 Couple of things you're allergic to. 35 00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:53,957 And, uh... 36 00:04:54,041 --> 00:04:57,207 Well, it's a list of things to do. You like to keep busy. 37 00:04:57,625 --> 00:04:59,249 "Pack bag." 38 00:04:59,333 --> 00:05:00,999 Today's our anniversary. 39 00:05:01,833 --> 00:05:03,124 I'm taking you away. 40 00:05:03,208 --> 00:05:05,624 - Tonight. After work. - Where? 41 00:05:06,750 --> 00:05:09,082 That's a surprise. 42 00:05:09,166 --> 00:05:10,874 A nice one. 43 00:05:11,333 --> 00:05:13,874 You'll understand when we get there, I promise. 44 00:05:18,166 --> 00:05:19,957 I love you, Christine. 45 00:06:25,583 --> 00:06:26,999 Christine? 46 00:06:27,083 --> 00:06:28,499 Yes? 47 00:06:28,791 --> 00:06:30,499 It's Dr Nasch. 48 00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:33,624 That'll mean nothing to you, I know, but don't worry. 49 00:06:34,041 --> 00:06:37,040 We've been doing some work on your memory. All right? 50 00:06:37,958 --> 00:06:40,790 Trying to figure out precisely what's caused your problem 51 00:06:40,875 --> 00:06:43,165 and whether there's anything we can do to fix it. 52 00:06:43,250 --> 00:06:45,499 Ben didn't say anything about this. 53 00:06:46,708 --> 00:06:48,707 I'm not certain that Ben knows. 54 00:06:50,250 --> 00:06:51,832 I don't understand. 55 00:06:53,041 --> 00:06:55,957 Christine, I want you to do something for me. 56 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:59,832 I want you to open the wardrobe in your bedroom. 57 00:07:00,916 --> 00:07:03,499 Your wardrobe in the bedroom. 58 00:07:11,166 --> 00:07:12,832 We're looking for something. 59 00:07:13,333 --> 00:07:17,332 Hidden at the bottom of the wardrobe, at the back, in a drawer. 60 00:07:19,125 --> 00:07:21,832 - What am I looking for? - We're looking for a shoe box. 61 00:07:22,416 --> 00:07:24,540 - Can you see it? - No. 62 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:27,415 The right-hand wardrobe nearest the bathroom. 63 00:07:40,083 --> 00:07:41,957 Have you found the camera, Christine? 64 00:07:43,833 --> 00:07:45,249 Yes. 65 00:07:45,416 --> 00:07:49,999 On the top, right-hand side of the camera is a power button. 66 00:07:50,583 --> 00:07:52,499 I want you to switch the camera on. 67 00:07:52,625 --> 00:07:55,415 Now I want you to hit the "play" button on the back of the camera. 68 00:07:59,083 --> 00:08:01,457 My name is Christine, Christine Lucas. 69 00:08:01,541 --> 00:08:03,957 I'm 40 years old and I'm an amnesiac. 70 00:08:05,125 --> 00:08:07,707 Tonight, as I sleep, my mind 71 00:08:07,791 --> 00:08:09,040 will erase everything, 72 00:08:09,125 --> 00:08:10,832 everything that I know today. 73 00:08:11,375 --> 00:08:13,332 Everything that I did today. 74 00:08:13,916 --> 00:08:16,999 And I will wake up tomorrow, like I did this morning, 75 00:08:17,083 --> 00:08:20,374 thinking that I have my whole life ahead of me. 76 00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:21,915 And the truth is... 77 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:24,874 The truth is half my life is over. 78 00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:28,624 Oh, shit. He's coming. 79 00:08:40,833 --> 00:08:42,082 Admittedly, 80 00:08:42,166 --> 00:08:45,124 this isn't a run-of-the-mill doctor-patient relationship. 81 00:08:46,750 --> 00:08:49,332 Picking you up at home, driving you to my office. 82 00:08:49,416 --> 00:08:52,207 Seeing you without your husband's knowledge. 83 00:08:57,166 --> 00:08:58,624 Are you all right? 84 00:09:22,375 --> 00:09:27,040 I saw you in the park six months ago, quite by chance. 85 00:09:27,375 --> 00:09:28,665 You'd been referred to me by a colleague 86 00:09:28,750 --> 00:09:31,707 but I'd had absolutely no luck getting hold of you. In fact, 87 00:09:32,291 --> 00:09:35,082 I recognised you from your photograph in the file. 88 00:09:36,375 --> 00:09:38,749 I explained that I was a neuropsychologist 89 00:09:38,833 --> 00:09:43,624 and that I was preparing a paper on atypical psychogenic amnesia, 90 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:48,207 and that I was prepared to treat you on a pro bono basis. 91 00:09:49,833 --> 00:09:51,540 You agreed to give me the telephone numbers 92 00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:53,165 you had written in your diary. 93 00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:00,832 I called you a few days later. 94 00:10:02,500 --> 00:10:04,290 You didn't remember meeting me, of course, 95 00:10:04,375 --> 00:10:06,082 but you did consent to see me again. 96 00:10:06,875 --> 00:10:08,290 Later that day you told me 97 00:10:08,375 --> 00:10:11,040 you'd mentioned the possibility of further treatment to Ben, 98 00:10:12,583 --> 00:10:13,999 who made it very clear to you 99 00:10:14,083 --> 00:10:16,207 you'd received extensive attention in the past 100 00:10:17,208 --> 00:10:20,207 and it had done nothing other than to upset you. 101 00:10:20,291 --> 00:10:21,707 After you. 102 00:10:27,125 --> 00:10:28,957 I want you to keep a visual diary. 103 00:10:30,791 --> 00:10:32,031 I've set the time and the date, 104 00:10:32,041 --> 00:10:34,499 I've put in the biggest memory chip I can find. 105 00:10:35,125 --> 00:10:38,249 It'll allow you to hold on to the previous day's memories. 106 00:10:38,333 --> 00:10:40,707 And even if the periods before and after the attack 107 00:10:40,791 --> 00:10:43,665 remain blank, at least this will bring some continuity... 108 00:10:43,750 --> 00:10:45,165 Attack? 109 00:10:46,333 --> 00:10:47,915 What attack? 110 00:10:48,666 --> 00:10:50,082 Ten years ago... 111 00:10:51,333 --> 00:10:53,207 you were found on an industrial estate 112 00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:55,582 not far from here. 113 00:10:56,333 --> 00:10:58,665 According to the medical report, 114 00:10:58,750 --> 00:11:02,957 your injuries were commensurate with repeated blows to the head. 115 00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:09,957 No. No, my husband said that I had an accident. 116 00:11:10,166 --> 00:11:11,624 I'm sure of it. 117 00:11:11,708 --> 00:11:13,665 I have a copy of the medical report here. 118 00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:18,999 Some newspaper articles. Mostly tabloid. 119 00:11:22,333 --> 00:11:24,749 There's very little information about the actual attack. 120 00:11:24,833 --> 00:11:26,874 "Left for dead"? 121 00:11:27,958 --> 00:11:29,832 Someone tried to kill me? 122 00:11:31,958 --> 00:11:33,957 Who? Who tried to kill me? 123 00:11:35,250 --> 00:11:36,665 No one knows. 124 00:11:37,166 --> 00:11:39,165 - What? - No one but you. 125 00:11:47,666 --> 00:11:50,374 I don't think Ben should know about the camera. 126 00:11:51,333 --> 00:11:52,957 It's your diary. 127 00:11:53,750 --> 00:11:55,999 I think it's important you don't feel... 128 00:11:56,083 --> 00:11:58,124 constrained by the thought of Ben checking up 129 00:11:58,208 --> 00:12:00,124 on your innermost thoughts and feelings. 130 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:22,915 If I don't tell Ben, how will I know the camera even exists? 131 00:12:24,250 --> 00:12:26,749 You could hide it at the bottom of your wardrobe. 132 00:12:26,958 --> 00:12:28,374 At the back. 133 00:12:29,416 --> 00:12:32,207 I'll call you in the morning to remind you. 134 00:12:34,666 --> 00:12:36,415 Was that a yes or a no? 135 00:12:42,166 --> 00:12:43,665 I want to get well. 136 00:12:54,125 --> 00:12:57,082 ♫ You still wanna be just friends 137 00:12:58,125 --> 00:13:01,999 ♫ But how can we still be friends when seeing you... 138 00:13:05,458 --> 00:13:07,915 ♫ And there ain't nothing I can do about it 139 00:13:21,708 --> 00:13:23,165 My name... 140 00:13:23,250 --> 00:13:26,082 My name is Christine Lucas. I'm 40, 40 years old 141 00:13:26,166 --> 00:13:27,582 and I'm an amnesiac. 142 00:13:28,375 --> 00:13:30,874 ♫ Get out my life why don't ya, babe? 143 00:13:31,166 --> 00:13:36,124 Tonight, as I sleep, my mind will erase everything I know, 144 00:13:36,208 --> 00:13:38,832 everything I did today. And I will wake up tomorrow... 145 00:13:41,375 --> 00:13:43,540 And the truth is half my life is over. 146 00:13:44,375 --> 00:13:45,790 And l... 147 00:13:53,791 --> 00:13:55,707 Oh, shit. He's coming. 148 00:14:05,666 --> 00:14:07,082 Christine? 149 00:14:53,041 --> 00:14:55,040 We've been married for 14 years. 150 00:14:57,416 --> 00:14:59,457 We met during your last term at King's. 151 00:15:00,250 --> 00:15:01,665 You were doing an MA in History. 152 00:15:01,750 --> 00:15:03,957 We got married a couple of years after that. 153 00:15:04,041 --> 00:15:06,707 I still teach at a school round the corner. 154 00:15:08,250 --> 00:15:10,290 I'm the head of the chemistry department. 155 00:15:13,875 --> 00:15:15,624 What do I do? 156 00:15:16,708 --> 00:15:18,499 You stay at home. 157 00:15:18,583 --> 00:15:20,540 What, I don't do anything? I don't... 158 00:15:20,625 --> 00:15:24,999 I don't study? I don't work from home? I just sit around all day? 159 00:15:25,291 --> 00:15:27,165 You store up information for a day. 160 00:15:28,083 --> 00:15:30,415 And when you wake up in the morning, it's all gone. 161 00:15:31,666 --> 00:15:33,915 You're back to your early 20s, Chris. 162 00:15:39,250 --> 00:15:42,540 And tonight, as I sleep, my mind... 163 00:15:42,625 --> 00:15:45,332 My mind will erase everything that I know, 164 00:15:45,416 --> 00:15:47,499 everything that I did today. 165 00:15:47,583 --> 00:15:50,415 And I will wake up tomorrow, like I did this morning, 166 00:15:50,500 --> 00:15:53,457 thinking that I have my whole life ahead of me. 167 00:15:55,250 --> 00:15:59,082 God, without this, I would believe anything that he says. Anything. 168 00:15:59,166 --> 00:16:01,124 That you had a car accident? 169 00:16:03,208 --> 00:16:05,332 I wonder what else he lies about? 170 00:16:06,625 --> 00:16:08,265 If we want to keep this between ourselves, 171 00:16:08,333 --> 00:16:11,957 I can't risk calling on the house phone when Ben's home. 172 00:16:12,333 --> 00:16:14,249 Why is he hiding the attack? 173 00:16:15,458 --> 00:16:17,374 Perhaps it's just easier. 174 00:16:20,375 --> 00:16:22,040 - God! - Sorry. 175 00:16:25,583 --> 00:16:28,415 I wish I wasn't so frightened all of the time. 176 00:16:28,500 --> 00:16:30,374 Do you really think this is a good idea? 177 00:16:30,458 --> 00:16:32,040 There are plenty of case histories of patients 178 00:16:32,125 --> 00:16:34,082 going back to where they suffered trauma. 179 00:16:34,875 --> 00:16:37,249 Actually, it's very rarely effective. 180 00:16:38,291 --> 00:16:39,749 So why are we doing it? 181 00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:42,790 We're building trust. 182 00:16:55,833 --> 00:16:57,165 Hang on a minute. 183 00:16:57,250 --> 00:16:59,332 - Mr. Nancarrow? - Yeah. 184 00:16:59,666 --> 00:17:01,540 I'm Dr Nasch, we spoke on the phone. 185 00:17:02,291 --> 00:17:03,915 Dr Nasch, yeah. 186 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:05,415 I'll have to call you back. 187 00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:17,832 Careful. 188 00:17:25,916 --> 00:17:27,874 Got quite a fright when I first saw you. 189 00:17:31,125 --> 00:17:32,540 Here, just down here. 190 00:17:34,666 --> 00:17:36,207 That's where I found you. 191 00:17:38,375 --> 00:17:41,165 Would you describe exactly what you saw? 192 00:17:41,250 --> 00:17:43,170 I don't know, it was a long time ago. 193 00:17:43,875 --> 00:17:45,374 Well, just tell us what you remember. 194 00:17:45,541 --> 00:17:47,040 I'd just come off shift. 195 00:17:48,250 --> 00:17:50,665 Miss Lucas was naked. 196 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,415 - Naked? - Apart from a sheet. 197 00:17:53,833 --> 00:17:55,290 A bed sheet or a plastic sheet? 198 00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:57,415 I'd have said if it was plastic. 199 00:17:57,625 --> 00:17:59,332 Where did I come from? 200 00:17:59,833 --> 00:18:01,457 You couldn't remember. 201 00:18:01,875 --> 00:18:04,415 You were very confused. 202 00:18:04,958 --> 00:18:06,457 There was blood. 203 00:18:07,875 --> 00:18:09,290 My blood? 204 00:18:09,750 --> 00:18:11,165 Where? 205 00:18:11,750 --> 00:18:13,124 Everywhere. 206 00:18:22,791 --> 00:18:24,790 What was I doing by the airport? 207 00:18:27,833 --> 00:18:30,790 Well, there are a lot of hotels in the area. 208 00:18:32,083 --> 00:18:33,499 Dozens. 209 00:18:33,958 --> 00:18:35,957 Hotels? 210 00:18:36,875 --> 00:18:38,790 It would explain the bed sheet. 211 00:18:39,458 --> 00:18:41,957 I live here. Why would I be staying in a hotel? 212 00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:47,207 All sorts of reasons. 213 00:18:52,166 --> 00:18:55,874 The medical examination indicated recent sexual intercourse. 214 00:18:58,916 --> 00:19:01,082 There was no trace of semen 215 00:19:01,166 --> 00:19:04,999 or anything to help the police identify the man you slept with. 216 00:19:07,791 --> 00:19:09,415 Was I raped? 217 00:19:10,458 --> 00:19:14,415 The police report suggested not. 218 00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,207 I'm married. I don't think I would be the kind of person 219 00:19:19,291 --> 00:19:20,957 who would cheat on my husband. 220 00:19:23,916 --> 00:19:25,832 How do you know? 221 00:19:32,708 --> 00:19:34,665 Whatever happened that night, 222 00:19:37,333 --> 00:19:39,290 whatever I've done, 223 00:19:42,333 --> 00:19:44,165 I have to remember. 224 00:19:45,458 --> 00:19:47,124 I know I do. 225 00:19:47,375 --> 00:19:49,082 I have to, for us. 226 00:19:52,916 --> 00:19:54,332 For us. 227 00:20:35,250 --> 00:20:36,665 Chris? 228 00:21:37,541 --> 00:21:38,957 No. 229 00:21:41,625 --> 00:21:42,625 No! 230 00:22:23,458 --> 00:22:25,999 Christine, could you open your eyes, please? 231 00:22:26,541 --> 00:22:29,290 We're going to show you some pictures. And I want you to look at each one 232 00:22:29,375 --> 00:22:31,165 and tell yourself what or who it is. 233 00:22:32,583 --> 00:22:34,290 Go ahead. 234 00:23:11,583 --> 00:23:12,999 Are you okay? 235 00:23:20,083 --> 00:23:22,290 Some of the photographs were taken from random, 236 00:23:22,375 --> 00:23:23,957 others from your file. 237 00:23:24,958 --> 00:23:27,290 This caused distinct neural excitation. 238 00:23:31,833 --> 00:23:33,915 Who is she? 239 00:23:35,750 --> 00:23:37,957 Did I have a friend? 240 00:23:38,041 --> 00:23:40,415 Of course. You had a lot. You were very popular. 241 00:23:41,666 --> 00:23:43,540 With red hair? 242 00:23:46,250 --> 00:23:48,374 - Not that I recall. - Called Claire. 243 00:23:49,625 --> 00:23:52,540 Claire? It doesn't ring a bell. Why? 244 00:23:54,375 --> 00:23:56,040 You're absolutely certain? 245 00:23:56,250 --> 00:23:58,707 Well, I mean, it's possible. You had a lot of friends. Why? 246 00:24:01,458 --> 00:24:03,415 It's just, I, uh... 247 00:24:03,666 --> 00:24:05,082 I had a memory. 248 00:24:05,333 --> 00:24:06,749 A memory? 249 00:24:09,500 --> 00:24:12,207 Mmm, well, sort of. I guess. 250 00:24:12,958 --> 00:24:14,957 That's great. What kind of memory? 251 00:24:15,916 --> 00:24:19,249 Claire. She had red hair. She was a friend. 252 00:24:19,666 --> 00:24:21,499 A good friend, I think. 253 00:24:22,208 --> 00:24:23,790 Well, I mean... 254 00:24:24,541 --> 00:24:27,624 I suppose you might have done, once. Years ago. 255 00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:30,415 Claire... 256 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:32,749 There might have been a Claire. 257 00:24:33,458 --> 00:24:34,957 A friend from college. 258 00:24:35,916 --> 00:24:36,999 There was a girl you were close to. 259 00:24:37,083 --> 00:24:39,665 I mean, she might have been called Claire. 260 00:24:39,750 --> 00:24:41,499 So what happened to her? 261 00:24:43,750 --> 00:24:45,165 What? 262 00:24:46,875 --> 00:24:49,207 This isn't the first time you've remembered Claire. 263 00:24:51,791 --> 00:24:53,499 I don't understand. 264 00:24:54,083 --> 00:24:55,790 It's not something we talk about. 265 00:24:57,166 --> 00:24:58,582 Why not? 266 00:24:59,666 --> 00:25:01,332 You drifted apart. 267 00:25:02,708 --> 00:25:04,040 Why? 268 00:25:04,125 --> 00:25:06,874 A couple of years after your accident, she moved away. 269 00:25:06,958 --> 00:25:09,165 - Where to? - Canada, I think. 270 00:25:09,250 --> 00:25:10,665 You think? 271 00:25:10,750 --> 00:25:12,332 Truth is it didn't really matter to you where she went. 272 00:25:12,416 --> 00:25:13,707 You couldn't remember her from one day to... 273 00:25:13,791 --> 00:25:15,749 it matters. It matters now. 274 00:25:22,166 --> 00:25:24,165 Don't say I didn't warn you. 275 00:25:37,750 --> 00:25:39,457 I keep them in my study. 276 00:25:45,250 --> 00:25:46,915 You hide them? 277 00:25:47,583 --> 00:25:49,207 They upset you. 278 00:25:49,500 --> 00:25:51,040 You hide a piece of my past from me? 279 00:25:51,125 --> 00:25:52,665 - To protect you. - From what? 280 00:25:54,583 --> 00:25:55,999 She couldn't handle it, Chris. 281 00:25:56,083 --> 00:25:57,915 She couldn't handle knowing that 15 minutes after she left, 282 00:25:58,000 --> 00:25:59,790 you had no idea she even existed. 283 00:26:02,083 --> 00:26:04,374 After a while, she stopped calling or even... 284 00:26:06,458 --> 00:26:10,624 - She wasn't the only one, Chris. - How can I trust you if you lie to me? 285 00:26:13,291 --> 00:26:16,249 I live with you. With this. 286 00:26:17,291 --> 00:26:19,332 Sometimes, when the truth is painful or complicated, 287 00:26:19,416 --> 00:26:20,624 I don't always have the strength. 288 00:26:20,708 --> 00:26:22,790 Usually I do, but not always. I'm sorry. 289 00:26:23,750 --> 00:26:26,915 - So, what, you edit my life? - This isn't just about you! 290 00:26:27,375 --> 00:26:29,124 Sometimes this is a question of what I can handle 291 00:26:29,208 --> 00:26:31,124 and I can't always handle everything! 292 00:26:31,958 --> 00:26:33,457 Not every day. 293 00:26:34,875 --> 00:26:37,457 Sometimes we both need a day off. 294 00:26:45,208 --> 00:26:46,665 He's keeping Claire from you. 295 00:26:46,750 --> 00:26:49,290 He says he's protecting you but he... 296 00:26:50,083 --> 00:26:51,582 Don't trust him. 297 00:26:51,666 --> 00:26:53,249 Don't trust Ben. 298 00:27:21,541 --> 00:27:23,540 - Hello? - Christine? 299 00:27:24,125 --> 00:27:26,082 Hello, it's Dr Nasch. 300 00:27:26,916 --> 00:27:30,457 You won't remember me, but we've been meeting almost every day 301 00:27:30,541 --> 00:27:32,707 for the last few weeks... A camera... 302 00:27:32,791 --> 00:27:34,249 it's in a shoe box 303 00:27:34,333 --> 00:27:37,165 somewhere on the bottom shelf of the cupboard nearest the bathroom. 304 00:27:37,375 --> 00:27:39,332 He's keeping Claire from you. 305 00:27:39,583 --> 00:27:41,332 He says he's protecting... 306 00:27:42,166 --> 00:27:43,582 Claire... 307 00:27:43,666 --> 00:27:44,999 He's keeping Claire... 308 00:27:45,083 --> 00:27:48,540 He says he's protecting you, but he's keeping Claire from you. 309 00:27:48,625 --> 00:27:52,749 Don't trust Ben. 310 00:28:15,375 --> 00:28:16,375 Bastard. 311 00:29:14,083 --> 00:29:15,707 Are you all right? 312 00:29:17,166 --> 00:29:18,749 I'm pregnant. 313 00:29:45,583 --> 00:29:47,583 "When you wake up in the morning, Pooh", 314 00:29:47,875 --> 00:29:50,290 "what's the first thing you say to yourself?" 315 00:29:50,833 --> 00:29:54,582 "What's for breakfast?' What do you say, Piglet?" 316 00:29:58,958 --> 00:30:02,665 "I say, I'll wonder what's going to happen exciting today?" 317 00:30:08,416 --> 00:30:10,040 - We have a child. - Chris... 318 00:30:10,125 --> 00:30:12,415 We have a child, a little boy, don't we? 319 00:30:12,500 --> 00:30:13,915 Don't we? 320 00:30:14,666 --> 00:30:22,666 Where is he? 321 00:30:28,958 --> 00:30:31,665 - Come inside. Come inside. - No. Where is he? 322 00:30:31,750 --> 00:30:33,350 I can't talk to you standing in the rain. 323 00:30:33,375 --> 00:30:36,874 Why are you hiding him from me? Where is my son? 324 00:30:37,166 --> 00:30:38,915 - I'm not hiding. Come inside, please. - Where is he? 325 00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:41,040 - Would you just come inside now... - No, I'm not coming inside! 326 00:30:41,125 --> 00:30:43,999 Come here... Come here. Come here and I'll tell you, I'll tell you. 327 00:30:44,083 --> 00:30:45,624 - Come here. - Where... 328 00:30:46,041 --> 00:30:48,332 He died. We have a son but he's dead. He died. 329 00:30:48,500 --> 00:30:50,874 - No! - He died. Please. 330 00:30:51,333 --> 00:30:53,165 No! 331 00:30:53,250 --> 00:30:54,624 Chris... 332 00:30:54,708 --> 00:30:56,624 Chris, here. Come on. 333 00:31:04,291 --> 00:31:05,749 How? 334 00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:08,415 Meningitis. 335 00:31:12,250 --> 00:31:13,665 How old? 336 00:31:14,041 --> 00:31:15,457 Eight. 337 00:31:17,125 --> 00:31:19,624 Adam died about three weeks before his ninth birthday. 338 00:31:37,666 --> 00:31:40,165 I keep these in the garage for safety. 339 00:31:44,708 --> 00:31:46,665 There are some things it wouldn't be good for you to stumble on 340 00:31:46,750 --> 00:31:48,165 when you're by yourself, Christine. 341 00:31:48,583 --> 00:31:50,624 Some things it's better I explain to you. 342 00:31:55,000 --> 00:31:56,832 This is Adam as a baby. 343 00:32:07,291 --> 00:32:08,915 That's my baby? 344 00:32:10,958 --> 00:32:12,457 Adam. 345 00:32:18,958 --> 00:32:22,540 He would have been about three months old there. 346 00:32:22,625 --> 00:32:26,124 - When was he born? - August 4th, 1999. 347 00:32:38,958 --> 00:32:40,374 Adam. 348 00:32:44,666 --> 00:32:46,499 Adam Thomas Lucas. 349 00:32:51,166 --> 00:32:52,957 Beautiful. 350 00:33:09,875 --> 00:33:12,082 "I am sick, please come home." 351 00:33:13,875 --> 00:33:15,082 Where was I? 352 00:33:15,541 --> 00:33:17,707 In and out of hospitals. 353 00:33:24,250 --> 00:33:26,207 - Chris. - No. 354 00:33:29,416 --> 00:33:32,624 I can't do it. I can't do this, I'm so sorry. 355 00:33:40,416 --> 00:33:42,707 Ben's been through all this before. 356 00:33:43,083 --> 00:33:44,915 His grief isn't new. 357 00:33:45,916 --> 00:33:47,665 But it's new for me. 358 00:33:53,916 --> 00:33:55,957 And it'll be new tomorrow. 359 00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:00,290 And it'll be new the next day and it'll be new the next day 360 00:34:00,375 --> 00:34:02,999 and the next, and the next and every day. 361 00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:06,415 Every day for the rest of my life. 362 00:34:22,750 --> 00:34:24,207 No! 363 00:34:43,541 --> 00:34:45,874 His grief isn't new. Mine is. 364 00:34:47,208 --> 00:34:48,624 Mine is. 365 00:34:51,291 --> 00:34:55,040 This isn't new for him. His grief isn't new. Mine is. 366 00:34:57,791 --> 00:34:59,207 Mine is. 367 00:35:02,000 --> 00:35:03,915 And it'll be new tomorrow. 368 00:35:05,041 --> 00:35:06,749 And it'll be new the next day 369 00:35:06,833 --> 00:35:09,499 and it'll be new the next day and the next and the next 370 00:35:09,583 --> 00:35:11,082 and every day. 371 00:35:12,000 --> 00:35:14,415 Every day for the rest of my life. 372 00:36:21,125 --> 00:36:25,665 - Did you know about Adam? - We've spoken about Adam. 373 00:36:27,416 --> 00:36:30,832 Maybe Ben's right. Maybe it's better I don't know. 374 00:36:40,208 --> 00:36:42,082 Can we just sit here a while? 375 00:36:45,583 --> 00:36:47,249 Of course. 376 00:36:57,166 --> 00:36:58,832 Should I tell Ben? 377 00:37:02,166 --> 00:37:03,624 About us? 378 00:37:05,958 --> 00:37:07,624 About the therapy? 379 00:37:21,541 --> 00:37:25,415 Was I a good mother? I mean, before the injury. 380 00:37:27,916 --> 00:37:29,915 You were a wonderful mother. 381 00:37:34,958 --> 00:37:38,082 It must have been awful for him, me not knowing who he was. 382 00:37:44,041 --> 00:37:45,957 You loved Adam very much. 383 00:38:07,250 --> 00:38:10,207 I understand why you would hide this from me, I do. 384 00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:13,790 And you've probably lived through this more times than you can bear. 385 00:38:13,875 --> 00:38:15,582 And I understand there must be days when you say, 386 00:38:15,666 --> 00:38:18,499 "I can't, I can't go through this again." 387 00:38:20,208 --> 00:38:23,582 But if you care about this marriage, and I have to assume you do, 388 00:38:23,666 --> 00:38:27,040 never try to hide my son from me again. 389 00:38:30,375 --> 00:38:37,249 I'm sorry. 390 00:39:14,333 --> 00:39:15,832 Adam? 391 00:39:35,083 --> 00:39:36,332 Mike. 392 00:39:45,666 --> 00:39:48,540 Good morning, Christine. It's Dr Nasch. 393 00:39:49,541 --> 00:39:51,957 I'm a neuropsychologist at University College, London, 394 00:39:52,041 --> 00:39:54,121 and I've been calling you every morning to remind you 395 00:39:54,166 --> 00:39:57,707 to look for the camera hidden in the back of your wardrobe. 396 00:39:58,333 --> 00:40:00,415 You've been keeping a video diary... 397 00:40:00,916 --> 00:40:03,874 Get ready, then I can come and pick you up from home. 398 00:40:12,291 --> 00:40:13,707 Mike. 399 00:40:13,916 --> 00:40:15,332 What? 400 00:40:15,416 --> 00:40:18,207 I'm not sure but I think that's his name. 401 00:40:20,083 --> 00:40:21,499 Whose name? 402 00:40:24,166 --> 00:40:26,665 The man who did this to me. 403 00:40:28,416 --> 00:40:30,374 Come here. 404 00:40:31,625 --> 00:40:33,040 Come on. 405 00:40:33,833 --> 00:40:35,665 Come here, come on. It's okay. 406 00:40:36,458 --> 00:40:38,249 It's okay. 407 00:40:53,875 --> 00:40:56,540 You're the only one who makes me feel good. 408 00:40:58,625 --> 00:41:01,165 I want you to feel good. 409 00:41:19,625 --> 00:41:20,665 Christine, I'm sorry. 410 00:42:07,625 --> 00:42:10,207 Christine, my name is Dr Nasch. 411 00:42:11,458 --> 00:42:13,749 - I know. - How do you feel? 412 00:42:14,875 --> 00:42:16,290 Shitty. 413 00:42:16,666 --> 00:42:18,415 I only administered a mild sedative. 414 00:42:18,500 --> 00:42:21,457 Just something to calm you down, not put you to sleep. 415 00:42:23,208 --> 00:42:25,499 - I remember. - You were confused. 416 00:42:26,666 --> 00:42:28,165 We call it confabulation, 417 00:42:28,250 --> 00:42:31,290 your imagination filling in the gaps in your memory, 418 00:42:31,375 --> 00:42:34,415 turning me into the man who did this to you. Do you understand? 419 00:42:34,500 --> 00:42:35,915 Ah... 420 00:42:36,166 --> 00:42:38,249 - I want to talk to Ben. - No. 421 00:42:39,541 --> 00:42:41,207 No, I just found something out 422 00:42:41,291 --> 00:42:43,171 and I need to talk to you about it face-to-face. 423 00:42:43,666 --> 00:42:45,582 Christine... 424 00:42:46,500 --> 00:42:48,165 it's about Ben. 425 00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:05,457 Who were you talking to? 426 00:43:06,875 --> 00:43:08,290 When? 427 00:43:08,958 --> 00:43:11,332 When I called earlier. It went straight to voice-mail. 428 00:43:11,416 --> 00:43:13,457 Oh, I was trying to call you. 429 00:43:22,333 --> 00:43:24,540 My name is Christine, Christine Lucas. 430 00:43:24,625 --> 00:43:27,290 I'm 40 years old and I'm an amnesiac. 431 00:43:27,375 --> 00:43:31,207 Tonight, as I sleep, my mind will erase everything... 432 00:43:31,291 --> 00:43:34,207 This isn't new for him. His grief isn't new. Mine is. 433 00:43:34,541 --> 00:43:36,207 You're vulnerable. 434 00:43:37,666 --> 00:43:40,915 Vulnerable patients often develop feelings for their psychiatrists. 435 00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:43,165 It's common. 436 00:43:44,083 --> 00:43:47,582 What's less common nowadays is when those feelings are reciprocated. 437 00:43:52,500 --> 00:43:55,207 We call it counter-transference. It's unprofessional. 438 00:43:57,708 --> 00:43:59,665 Completely unprofessional. 439 00:44:00,166 --> 00:44:02,332 On my video, I say that you're my only hope. 440 00:44:03,333 --> 00:44:06,540 I'm referring you to an excellent neuropsychiatrist at St Thomas'. 441 00:44:07,541 --> 00:44:09,832 I say that we're making progress. 442 00:44:10,291 --> 00:44:14,874 Christine, I can't go on treating you. It wouldn't be ethical. 443 00:44:14,958 --> 00:44:16,874 - Please. - Christine. 444 00:44:18,750 --> 00:44:22,457 She works out of the university department at King's College. 445 00:44:22,541 --> 00:44:24,021 - She's very good. - I don't want her. 446 00:44:24,041 --> 00:44:25,832 I want you. You're fixing me. 447 00:44:27,416 --> 00:44:29,207 When I called you this morning, 448 00:44:30,375 --> 00:44:32,499 you'd already watched your video diary. 449 00:44:34,375 --> 00:44:35,915 You remembered. 450 00:44:38,541 --> 00:44:41,124 Yes. Yes! 451 00:44:41,416 --> 00:44:43,207 Unfortunately, what you remember one day 452 00:44:43,291 --> 00:44:45,540 you may not necessarily remember the next. 453 00:44:46,583 --> 00:44:48,082 Even the most significant things. 454 00:44:49,708 --> 00:44:51,374 What things? 455 00:44:53,958 --> 00:44:58,207 Ben had you transferred from the psychiatric hospital in 2007 456 00:44:58,291 --> 00:45:01,124 to an adult community care centre. 457 00:45:01,208 --> 00:45:03,957 I rang the administrator the other day to arrange a visit. 458 00:45:04,291 --> 00:45:08,499 It seems your friend Claire has been trying to get in touch. 459 00:45:10,375 --> 00:45:12,082 This is her number. 460 00:45:19,416 --> 00:45:22,957 The administrator asked how you were and I told her. 461 00:45:23,041 --> 00:45:24,999 She became extremely confused. 462 00:45:26,416 --> 00:45:27,749 Why? 463 00:45:27,875 --> 00:45:29,832 Well, according to her records, 464 00:45:32,166 --> 00:45:33,749 Ben divorced you four years ago. 465 00:45:39,708 --> 00:45:42,124 Hi, you've reached Claire. Leave a message. 466 00:45:42,541 --> 00:45:43,999 Claire, it's, uh... 467 00:45:44,083 --> 00:45:45,707 it's Christine Lucas. 468 00:45:46,583 --> 00:45:49,290 Um, I really need to talk to you. 469 00:45:49,375 --> 00:45:51,335 Can you call me, please? My number is, uh, zero... 470 00:46:08,125 --> 00:46:11,290 - We're divorced, aren't we? - Who told you? 471 00:46:12,375 --> 00:46:15,040 Who told me? No one. I'm remembering things. 472 00:46:15,125 --> 00:46:16,374 - Really? - Yes. 473 00:46:16,458 --> 00:46:17,915 - You sure? - Yes. 474 00:46:18,208 --> 00:46:20,790 - You're remembering an awful lot lately. - Stay away. 475 00:46:22,208 --> 00:46:24,249 Just tell me the fucking truth. 476 00:46:24,541 --> 00:46:26,540 Why did you divorce me? 477 00:46:27,708 --> 00:46:29,874 - Why did you divorce me? - You want the truth? 478 00:46:29,958 --> 00:46:31,374 - Yes. - I'll tell you the truth! 479 00:46:31,458 --> 00:46:38,832 We had a little boy. 480 00:46:39,500 --> 00:46:42,915 And he got very sick very suddenly and we lost him. 481 00:46:51,583 --> 00:46:54,040 I walked away. I was in bits. 482 00:47:01,541 --> 00:47:03,457 I came back and I'm here. 483 00:47:06,583 --> 00:47:09,207 I'll never leave you, Chris. Never. 484 00:47:13,833 --> 00:47:15,415 I'm sorry. 485 00:47:50,833 --> 00:47:52,290 Hello? 486 00:47:52,458 --> 00:47:53,957 Chrissy? 487 00:47:58,250 --> 00:47:59,832 Claire? 488 00:47:59,958 --> 00:48:02,374 Oh, my God, Chrissy, darling, is that really you? 489 00:48:07,083 --> 00:48:08,749 Yes, it's me. 490 00:48:11,083 --> 00:48:13,207 You call me Chrissy. 491 00:48:14,750 --> 00:48:17,415 I kept ringing the care centre. Did they tell you? 492 00:48:17,500 --> 00:48:20,540 They gave me your old address and all my letters were returned. 493 00:48:21,541 --> 00:48:23,290 Every day, every single day, 494 00:48:23,375 --> 00:48:26,457 I've been waiting for this phone to ring, hoping it might be you. 495 00:48:28,125 --> 00:48:31,207 They, um... They told me that you moved away. 496 00:48:31,291 --> 00:48:32,707 - Moved away? - Yes. 497 00:48:32,791 --> 00:48:34,540 - Whatever gave you that idea? - Um... 498 00:48:34,625 --> 00:48:37,832 Oh, my God, Chrissy. I've missed you so much. 499 00:48:37,916 --> 00:48:40,749 - Oh... - How are you? 500 00:48:42,541 --> 00:48:44,165 Um... 501 00:48:44,250 --> 00:48:47,415 Well, I can't remember a fucking thing but otherwise I'm fine. 502 00:48:50,458 --> 00:48:52,582 - Where are you? - Um... 503 00:48:53,333 --> 00:48:55,749 I'm at home. I'm with Ben. 504 00:48:57,125 --> 00:48:59,999 And I really need to see you. Can I see you? 505 00:49:00,875 --> 00:49:02,457 Yeah. Um... 506 00:49:02,541 --> 00:49:05,082 I'd rather not come to you, Chris. 507 00:49:05,583 --> 00:49:06,790 Why? 508 00:49:06,875 --> 00:49:09,915 It's difficult to explain over a phone... 509 00:49:10,500 --> 00:49:12,957 How about we meet at the Observatory? 510 00:49:13,875 --> 00:49:14,999 Um... 511 00:49:15,083 --> 00:49:16,790 - The Observe... - In Greenwich. 512 00:49:16,875 --> 00:49:18,540 I could be there in an hour. 513 00:49:21,625 --> 00:49:23,582 Will you be okay? 514 00:49:29,833 --> 00:49:32,499 Yes, I'm fine and I'll be there. 515 00:50:07,791 --> 00:50:09,374 Chrissy? 516 00:50:11,833 --> 00:50:14,499 Chrissy, darling, it's me, Claire. 517 00:50:16,333 --> 00:50:24,290 Claire. 518 00:50:25,375 --> 00:50:26,874 Oh... 519 00:50:29,000 --> 00:50:30,790 I remember you. 520 00:50:37,875 --> 00:50:39,374 Yeah? 521 00:50:42,125 --> 00:50:43,624 Oh... 522 00:50:43,958 --> 00:50:46,290 I've missed you, I've missed you, I've missed you! 523 00:50:46,375 --> 00:50:48,124 I remember you. 524 00:50:49,875 --> 00:50:52,290 I've missed you so much. 525 00:50:53,708 --> 00:50:55,124 Oh... 526 00:50:55,208 --> 00:50:57,540 This is amazing. 527 00:51:01,583 --> 00:51:03,624 Was I a good mother? 528 00:51:03,708 --> 00:51:07,540 Oh, Chrissy. Nobody was more loved than Adam. 529 00:51:08,083 --> 00:51:10,915 Ben used to rush home from work just to see his little boy. 530 00:51:11,291 --> 00:51:13,832 Adam was so like him at that age. 531 00:51:14,541 --> 00:51:17,207 Even then he was just as handsome as his daddy. 532 00:51:21,750 --> 00:51:23,957 Who did this to me? 533 00:51:27,666 --> 00:51:29,999 Things were tough. 534 00:51:30,916 --> 00:51:33,290 You were juggling looking after Adam 535 00:51:33,375 --> 00:51:35,374 and starting a new teaching job. 536 00:51:37,250 --> 00:51:38,874 You and Ben were arguing a lot. 537 00:51:39,375 --> 00:51:42,457 I said I'd look after Adam two afternoons a week. 538 00:51:43,875 --> 00:51:47,832 After a month or so back at work, you seemed to get better, you... 539 00:51:49,083 --> 00:51:51,499 You even started dressing differently. 540 00:51:52,333 --> 00:51:54,749 I didn't realise what it was at the time. 541 00:51:54,833 --> 00:51:56,540 I met someone? 542 00:51:57,250 --> 00:51:58,832 I asked you. 543 00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:04,207 You denied it at first but you knew I wasn't stupid. 544 00:52:05,750 --> 00:52:07,540 We had an argument. 545 00:52:08,250 --> 00:52:10,165 Eventually, you told me the truth. 546 00:52:10,250 --> 00:52:11,790 I didn't tell you his name? 547 00:52:11,875 --> 00:52:13,915 You wouldn't give me any details about him. 548 00:52:14,250 --> 00:52:15,915 Did Ben know? 549 00:52:16,166 --> 00:52:17,874 Not until the police found you. 550 00:52:18,125 --> 00:52:19,999 Oh, Jesus. 551 00:52:21,125 --> 00:52:23,207 Oh, poor Ben. 552 00:52:23,291 --> 00:52:24,790 I had to tell him, Chrissy. 553 00:52:24,875 --> 00:52:27,499 I'd already told the police. I had no choice. 554 00:52:28,208 --> 00:52:30,707 No wonder he keeps lying to me. 555 00:52:30,791 --> 00:52:32,415 Well, that's Ben. 556 00:52:32,958 --> 00:52:35,165 - Protecting you. - Maybe. 557 00:52:36,333 --> 00:52:39,749 Or maybe he thinks we just can't come to terms with the truth. 558 00:52:40,416 --> 00:52:42,136 I mean, he still lies to me about the attack 559 00:52:42,208 --> 00:52:43,790 and he never talks to me about you. 560 00:52:46,083 --> 00:52:47,540 Well... 561 00:52:48,666 --> 00:52:53,249 There's a reason why he doesn't talk about me to you. 562 00:52:54,291 --> 00:52:55,749 Why? 563 00:52:57,458 --> 00:52:59,457 After your accident, 564 00:53:00,375 --> 00:53:02,582 I tried to help out. 565 00:53:02,666 --> 00:53:05,332 You can imagine how hard it was for Ben looking after Adam. 566 00:53:05,666 --> 00:53:07,540 I did what I could. 567 00:53:08,708 --> 00:53:10,207 We spent a lot of time together. 568 00:53:10,500 --> 00:53:12,582 One day, after visiting you, he just... 569 00:53:13,833 --> 00:53:16,499 collapsed. He said he couldn't go on any more. 570 00:53:18,000 --> 00:53:19,582 L... 571 00:53:20,541 --> 00:53:22,457 I put my arms around him. 572 00:53:22,916 --> 00:53:24,832 We got carried away. 573 00:53:25,500 --> 00:53:27,582 It only happened once. 574 00:53:29,583 --> 00:53:31,415 I felt so bad. 575 00:53:32,333 --> 00:53:34,415 We both felt so bad. 576 00:53:35,375 --> 00:53:37,665 I decided I owed it to both of you to stay away 577 00:53:37,750 --> 00:53:39,540 so I just... 578 00:53:41,458 --> 00:53:43,207 disappeared. 579 00:53:45,791 --> 00:53:47,374 I'm so sorry. 580 00:53:50,625 --> 00:53:53,540 Well, you can hardly blame us, Christine, after your affair. 581 00:53:54,333 --> 00:53:56,415 You don't know how lucky you are. 582 00:53:56,500 --> 00:53:59,332 You have never known how lucky you are to have Ben. 583 00:54:01,125 --> 00:54:03,249 - I have to go. - Oh, Chrissy... 584 00:54:03,333 --> 00:54:05,415 - Ben will be home soon and... - Please. 585 00:54:05,500 --> 00:54:08,249 - He'll worry if I'm not there. - Look, just wait. 586 00:54:11,416 --> 00:54:14,582 Ben sent this to me shortly before you separated. 587 00:54:16,000 --> 00:54:19,290 He asked me to give it to you if you were ever well enough to read it. 588 00:54:23,208 --> 00:54:25,249 I'm so glad that you are. 589 00:54:25,541 --> 00:54:28,332 I don't expect you to believe me but I care about you, Christine. 590 00:54:28,916 --> 00:54:30,374 A lot. 591 00:54:32,583 --> 00:54:34,249 It's all right. 592 00:54:44,583 --> 00:54:46,249 "My darling Christine", 593 00:54:48,083 --> 00:54:50,415 "I can't bear to say the words" 594 00:54:50,916 --> 00:54:53,332 "but I have decided to leave you." 595 00:54:53,791 --> 00:54:56,957 "I've tried so hard to find another way, Chris." 596 00:54:57,458 --> 00:54:59,207 "Please believe me." 597 00:55:00,750 --> 00:55:02,707 "You loved Adam," 598 00:55:03,583 --> 00:55:05,957 "even if you couldn't consciously remember him." 599 00:55:06,833 --> 00:55:09,540 "He would run into your arms and you would pick him up" 600 00:55:10,291 --> 00:55:12,915 "and for a while, you sensed who he was." 601 00:55:14,291 --> 00:55:15,790 "Then you started to believe" 602 00:55:15,875 --> 00:55:18,915 "that Adam had been taken away from you when he was a baby." 603 00:55:19,583 --> 00:55:22,582 "Every time you saw him, you thought it was for the first time." 604 00:55:24,916 --> 00:55:28,165 "I'd ask him to tell you when he last saw you, and he'd say,." 605 00:55:28,958 --> 00:55:30,707 "Yesterday, Mummy." 606 00:55:30,791 --> 00:55:32,999 "But you wouldn't believe him." 607 00:55:33,583 --> 00:55:36,749 "One day you attacked me, grabbed Adam and ran." 608 00:55:37,250 --> 00:55:39,207 "He started screaming." 609 00:55:39,291 --> 00:55:42,415 "Later, I tried to explain but he didn't understand." 610 00:55:42,500 --> 00:55:44,790 "He became frightened to come and see you." 611 00:55:46,625 --> 00:55:50,124 "I left it a few days and then called to find out how you were." 612 00:55:50,208 --> 00:55:52,415 "They said you were happy." 613 00:55:53,458 --> 00:55:56,332 "When I asked them if you remembered us," 614 00:55:56,416 --> 00:55:58,165 "they said no." 615 00:56:01,041 --> 00:56:03,665 "I love you so much, Chris." 616 00:56:03,750 --> 00:56:07,457 "I love you more than I love anything or anyone in this world." 617 00:56:08,583 --> 00:56:11,207 "But our son is only eight years old." 618 00:56:12,750 --> 00:56:15,082 "He's desperately unhappy, Chris." 619 00:56:15,875 --> 00:56:19,374 "And I just can't put him through that kind of trauma again." 620 00:56:20,958 --> 00:56:23,582 "I want you both to be happy," 621 00:56:23,666 --> 00:56:27,040 "even if you can only find that happiness without us." 622 00:56:28,125 --> 00:56:30,540 "Forgive me. Ben." 623 00:56:36,958 --> 00:56:38,915 I forgive you. 624 00:56:40,125 --> 00:56:42,207 Can you forgive me? 625 00:56:45,916 --> 00:56:49,290 You're my lover. You're my protector. 626 00:56:49,916 --> 00:56:53,082 And my life is nothing, nothing without you. 627 00:56:56,833 --> 00:57:00,124 By the time you see this, you will know everything. 628 00:57:02,750 --> 00:57:06,832 And you will know that there is nothing inside me for you now but love. 629 00:57:10,000 --> 00:57:13,540 And the hope that we can finally find a way to truly be together. 630 00:57:16,250 --> 00:57:17,790 Hello? 631 00:57:19,333 --> 00:57:20,832 Chris? 632 00:57:21,166 --> 00:57:22,665 I forgive you. 633 00:57:24,750 --> 00:57:26,999 Can you forgive me? 634 00:57:27,083 --> 00:57:31,040 You're my lover. You're my protector. You're my... You're my everything. 635 00:57:31,125 --> 00:57:34,249 So by the time you see this, you will know everything. 636 00:57:34,333 --> 00:57:35,749 You will know that there... 637 00:57:36,916 --> 00:57:38,716 No, I want you to watch it from the beginning. 638 00:57:39,083 --> 00:57:41,415 What do you mean, "you will know everything"? 639 00:57:45,458 --> 00:57:48,332 I've been seeing a doctor, Dr Nasch. 640 00:57:49,333 --> 00:57:51,082 For a few weeks. 641 00:57:52,791 --> 00:57:54,790 He gave me the camera. 642 00:57:57,000 --> 00:58:00,124 He's been calling me every morning to remind me. 643 00:58:01,291 --> 00:58:03,082 Why would you do that? 644 00:58:04,125 --> 00:58:05,582 To hold on to my memories. 645 00:58:05,666 --> 00:58:07,346 No, I mean, why would you keep it a secret? 646 00:58:07,416 --> 00:58:09,415 Because I wasn't sure if I could trust you. 647 00:58:13,125 --> 00:58:15,499 - I know now I can. - Are you having an affair? 648 00:58:15,583 --> 00:58:18,957 No. 649 00:58:19,041 --> 00:58:21,332 I know how much I hurt you. 650 00:58:21,875 --> 00:58:25,540 I know what it's taken for you to forgive me and l... 651 00:58:25,625 --> 00:58:29,249 I understand why you left. I understand everything now. 652 00:58:29,625 --> 00:58:31,207 Ben... 653 00:58:32,083 --> 00:58:35,874 You're so good to me. I love you. I love you so... 654 00:58:53,000 --> 00:58:54,749 He did what? 655 00:58:55,250 --> 00:58:56,999 Let me talk to him. 656 00:58:57,083 --> 00:58:59,999 He, uh... He left. 657 00:59:01,375 --> 00:59:03,290 I'm going to call him. 658 00:59:04,000 --> 00:59:05,540 I don't think that's a good idea. 659 00:59:05,625 --> 00:59:07,082 Look, I love you both. 660 00:59:07,166 --> 00:59:08,874 God. 661 00:59:11,083 --> 00:59:12,707 I'll call you right back. 662 00:59:23,083 --> 00:59:24,915 Ben hit me. 663 00:59:25,625 --> 00:59:27,290 L, um... 664 00:59:27,375 --> 00:59:30,540 told him everything and he hit me. 665 00:59:32,500 --> 00:59:34,957 And nothing can alter that, so... 666 00:59:37,916 --> 00:59:38,957 Ah... 667 00:59:42,916 --> 00:59:45,332 - Hello? - I spoke to Ben. 668 00:59:46,666 --> 00:59:49,582 He says he's been living alone, Chris. 669 00:59:50,041 --> 00:59:51,124 What? 670 00:59:51,208 --> 00:59:54,832 Ben says he hasn't seen you for four years. 671 00:59:54,916 --> 00:59:56,624 Christine, 672 00:59:57,458 --> 00:59:59,457 describe Ben to me. 673 01:00:02,166 --> 01:00:05,249 - What? - Describe Ben to me. 674 01:00:05,583 --> 01:00:07,124 What does he look like? 675 01:00:07,208 --> 01:00:08,915 Is he tall? 676 01:00:11,625 --> 01:00:13,124 Yes. 677 01:00:13,208 --> 01:00:14,790 Black hair? 678 01:00:17,083 --> 01:00:20,415 No. No, he has brown hair. 679 01:00:22,583 --> 01:00:24,540 Does he have a scar? 680 01:00:26,166 --> 01:00:29,332 - A scar? - Yeah. He had a skiing accident. 681 01:00:29,416 --> 01:00:32,332 He should have a scar across the right side of his face. 682 01:00:49,125 --> 01:00:50,707 Chrissy? 683 01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:56,999 No. No, he doesn't. 684 01:00:57,166 --> 01:00:58,582 Ben doesn't have a scar. 685 01:01:02,208 --> 01:01:03,874 The man you're living with, 686 01:01:04,250 --> 01:01:06,207 I don't know who he is, Christine. 687 01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:09,790 But it's not Ben! 688 01:01:44,875 --> 01:01:46,165 Help me. 689 01:01:46,250 --> 01:01:49,457 I need your address, Christine. I need to know where you're living. 690 01:01:51,083 --> 01:01:53,665 I can't... I can't remember. 691 01:02:01,166 --> 01:02:03,207 I'll be right out. 692 01:02:04,000 --> 01:02:07,207 Find out quickly and I'll call you back on your mobile. 693 01:05:13,500 --> 01:05:15,082 Who are you? 694 01:05:15,500 --> 01:05:18,165 I'm your husband. Ben. 695 01:05:27,500 --> 01:05:29,749 - Christine? - Yes? 696 01:05:29,833 --> 01:05:33,082 It's Dr Nasch. That'll mean nothing to you, I know... 697 01:05:33,166 --> 01:05:34,832 We've been doing some work on your memory. 698 01:05:34,916 --> 01:05:37,624 Trying to figure out precisely what... Have you found the camera, Christine? 699 01:05:37,708 --> 01:05:39,124 Yes. 700 01:05:39,208 --> 01:05:41,249 Watch it and I'll call you back. 701 01:05:41,333 --> 01:05:44,124 You're my lover. You're my protector. 702 01:05:44,583 --> 01:05:46,874 My life is nothing without you. 703 01:05:48,041 --> 01:05:50,790 By the time you see this, you will know everything 704 01:05:50,875 --> 01:05:55,207 and you will know that there is nothing inside me for you now but love. 705 01:05:57,916 --> 01:06:02,124 And the hope that we can finally find a way to truly be together. 706 01:06:26,833 --> 01:06:28,249 Hello? 707 01:06:28,333 --> 01:06:31,665 Christine, it's me. Is everything okay? 708 01:06:32,583 --> 01:06:34,707 Everything's fine. 709 01:06:41,416 --> 01:06:42,999 Ben? 710 01:06:43,750 --> 01:06:46,582 Sorry, yes, I heard. I'm in traffic. 711 01:06:50,125 --> 01:06:52,415 Just wanted to make sure you remembered to pack 712 01:06:52,500 --> 01:06:54,165 for our anniversary. 713 01:06:55,250 --> 01:06:56,874 To pack? 714 01:06:57,958 --> 01:07:01,124 - I wrote it on the board in the kitchen. - Yes, I remember. 715 01:07:01,750 --> 01:07:03,374 Ben... 716 01:07:05,666 --> 01:07:07,457 I love you. 717 01:07:09,583 --> 01:07:12,040 I love you, too, Christine. 718 01:07:41,958 --> 01:07:44,957 Dr Nasch, please come to main reception. 719 01:07:45,041 --> 01:07:47,332 Dr Nasch, please come to main reception. 720 01:07:58,666 --> 01:08:00,207 Dr Nasch? 721 01:08:01,666 --> 01:08:03,082 Can I help you? 722 01:08:06,500 --> 01:08:07,915 I'm Ben Lucas. 723 01:08:09,875 --> 01:08:12,832 Oh, Mr. Lucas. How's Christine? 724 01:08:14,166 --> 01:08:15,749 How is she? 725 01:08:17,791 --> 01:08:20,332 Stay the fuck away from my wife. 726 01:09:11,000 --> 01:09:13,665 - Is this really our anniversary? - Yes. 727 01:09:17,958 --> 01:09:20,165 Our wedding anniversary? 728 01:09:21,041 --> 01:09:22,499 No. 729 01:09:23,208 --> 01:09:25,457 It's a different kind of anniversary. 730 01:09:58,208 --> 01:10:00,374 Why have you brought me here? 731 01:10:25,041 --> 01:10:26,457 I want you to remember. 732 01:10:27,208 --> 01:10:31,374 Oh, Mike, I can't do this, I can't. I'm married. 733 01:10:31,458 --> 01:10:33,165 Oh, Mike, I can't. 734 01:10:33,958 --> 01:10:35,665 How about this? 735 01:10:37,666 --> 01:10:45,207 Mike? 736 01:10:48,291 --> 01:10:49,749 Where's Ben? 737 01:10:50,333 --> 01:10:52,124 Ben left you. 738 01:10:56,791 --> 01:10:58,332 I didn't. 739 01:10:58,708 --> 01:11:00,665 I stayed close by. 740 01:11:01,333 --> 01:11:04,582 Watching over you. Protecting you. 741 01:11:04,916 --> 01:11:07,082 - Protecting me? - Mmm. 742 01:11:07,166 --> 01:11:10,665 While your so-called husband left you to rot in a care home, 743 01:11:10,750 --> 01:11:13,540 I watched you wither and die, day by day. 744 01:11:14,750 --> 01:11:17,040 I couldn't stand it any longer. 745 01:11:18,625 --> 01:11:20,374 I had to get you out of there. 746 01:11:21,083 --> 01:11:22,707 They let you take me home? 747 01:11:22,791 --> 01:11:25,999 False documents and a fake smile. I got you out in half an hour. 748 01:11:28,000 --> 01:11:29,624 Do you honestly think I'd have got away with this 749 01:11:29,708 --> 01:11:31,588 if anyone else gave a shit about you, Christine? 750 01:11:33,625 --> 01:11:36,290 You know, this whole Ben charade wasn't the point. 751 01:11:36,375 --> 01:11:42,499 The point... 752 01:11:45,583 --> 01:11:47,665 was to care for you. 753 01:11:48,416 --> 01:11:51,999 Was to look after you. Was to love you. 754 01:11:58,083 --> 01:12:01,790 I honestly meant to tell you the truth but you were so distraught and then... 755 01:12:03,333 --> 01:12:06,374 then the lie just got bigger and bigger... 756 01:12:08,333 --> 01:12:10,874 You know what? I'm sick of explaining. 757 01:12:10,958 --> 01:12:13,040 And I'm tired of lying. 758 01:12:15,708 --> 01:12:18,665 That's why I brought you here. To put an end to this. 759 01:12:20,375 --> 01:12:23,790 We're going to leave here, not as Christine and Ben 760 01:12:23,875 --> 01:12:25,499 but as Christine and Mike. 761 01:12:25,583 --> 01:12:27,040 I can't keep doing this. 762 01:12:27,833 --> 01:12:30,665 Well, call Ben and tell him the truth. 763 01:12:34,333 --> 01:12:36,665 - No. - Tell him. 764 01:12:36,791 --> 01:12:38,999 Don't be ridiculous. I can't do that. 765 01:12:39,083 --> 01:12:40,249 Then I will. 766 01:12:41,958 --> 01:12:43,624 If I were Ben, I'd want to know. 767 01:12:43,708 --> 01:12:45,124 Don't be a prick, Mike. 768 01:12:49,250 --> 01:12:50,665 You did this. 769 01:12:53,833 --> 01:12:54,874 No. 770 01:12:57,250 --> 01:12:58,790 No! No! 771 01:12:58,875 --> 01:13:00,582 What did you expect me to do? 772 01:13:00,666 --> 01:13:02,665 I tried talking to you, you wouldn't listen. 773 01:13:02,916 --> 01:13:04,707 I'd never hurt you. 774 01:13:06,291 --> 01:13:07,571 I hate myself for what happened. 775 01:13:11,166 --> 01:13:13,499 It's all right. Please don't leave. 776 01:13:15,416 --> 01:13:17,832 I'm scared. 777 01:13:22,166 --> 01:13:24,415 Don't leave. 778 01:13:30,708 --> 01:13:32,332 Go. 779 01:13:33,291 --> 01:13:34,707 Go, then. 780 01:13:35,250 --> 01:13:36,332 Thank you. 781 01:13:39,541 --> 01:13:42,082 What did you have to go and do that for? You see, this is what I'm talking about. 782 01:13:42,166 --> 01:13:44,165 This is what happens! 783 01:13:45,500 --> 01:13:48,749 - God, I'm sorry. - And will you stop fucking apologising! 784 01:13:52,166 --> 01:13:54,665 I just don't want to be Ben any more. 785 01:13:55,916 --> 01:13:58,707 Nothing... I've nothing to live for except for you. 786 01:14:01,333 --> 01:14:02,915 Understand? 787 01:14:06,250 --> 01:14:07,499 Please let me go. 788 01:14:07,583 --> 01:14:10,582 No, we leave together or we don't leave at all. 789 01:14:14,750 --> 01:14:21,624 Now... 790 01:14:22,166 --> 01:14:23,582 No more guilt. 791 01:14:28,375 --> 01:14:29,832 No more grief. 792 01:14:32,208 --> 01:14:33,874 No more battles to fight. 793 01:14:47,541 --> 01:14:48,999 Now... 794 01:14:50,708 --> 01:14:52,457 You're free. 795 01:15:00,333 --> 01:15:01,957 Come here. 796 01:15:03,833 --> 01:15:06,082 Come on. 797 01:15:09,083 --> 01:15:10,499 Come. 798 01:15:19,416 --> 01:15:20,874 Here. 799 01:15:26,458 --> 01:15:28,082 Come here. 800 01:15:33,041 --> 01:15:34,582 Kiss me. 801 01:15:43,291 --> 01:15:44,874 Again. 802 01:15:56,833 --> 01:15:58,499 Forget Ben. 803 01:15:59,541 --> 01:16:01,249 He's forgotten you. 804 01:16:02,458 --> 01:16:04,374 You must forget Adam. 805 01:16:05,250 --> 01:16:07,124 He's forgotten you. 806 01:16:08,458 --> 01:16:10,415 Adam's forgotten you. 807 01:16:11,333 --> 01:16:15,082 Adam? 808 01:16:21,625 --> 01:16:23,290 My son is alive? 809 01:16:48,541 --> 01:16:49,790 Ah! 810 01:16:55,625 --> 01:16:58,624 We leave together or we don't leave at all. 811 01:16:58,875 --> 01:17:01,082 Do you understand me? 812 01:17:01,750 --> 01:17:03,540 Let me go, please. Let me go. 813 01:17:37,500 --> 01:17:38,915 Ah! 814 01:18:19,458 --> 01:18:24,082 My name is Christine Lucas. I'm 40 years old and I'm an amnesiac. 815 01:18:24,166 --> 01:18:28,332 Tonight, as I sleep, my mind will erase everything that I know, 816 01:18:28,416 --> 01:18:30,915 everything that I did today. 817 01:18:31,000 --> 01:18:33,540 And I will wake up tomorrow like I did this morning, 818 01:18:33,625 --> 01:18:36,374 thinking that I have my whole life ahead of me. 819 01:18:38,541 --> 01:18:40,707 And the truth is, the truth is 820 01:18:40,791 --> 01:18:44,457 I will never let anyone take my life from me again. 821 01:18:44,541 --> 01:18:48,165 And I will not wake up tomorrow thinking that my son is dead. 822 01:18:48,833 --> 01:18:54,415 I will not. 823 01:19:24,083 --> 01:19:25,832 Christine? 824 01:19:28,333 --> 01:19:30,832 Christine, my name is Dr Nasch. 825 01:19:30,916 --> 01:19:33,957 I'm a neuropsychologist. I treated you for several weeks. 826 01:19:37,791 --> 01:19:40,332 But I'm not here today as your doctor, 827 01:19:41,375 --> 01:19:43,374 I'm here as a friend. 828 01:19:45,791 --> 01:19:49,290 You have two cracked ribs, mild concussion, 829 01:19:50,041 --> 01:19:51,665 so you'll need someone to keep an eye on you 830 01:19:51,750 --> 01:19:53,374 but you're going to be fine. 831 01:19:54,041 --> 01:19:56,332 Your friend Claire is coming by this afternoon 832 01:19:56,416 --> 01:19:58,665 to pick you up, to take you home with her. 833 01:20:02,583 --> 01:20:04,332 Do you remember Claire? 834 01:20:12,625 --> 01:20:14,207 Red hair. 835 01:20:17,291 --> 01:20:18,999 That's very good. 836 01:20:21,250 --> 01:20:23,207 And you're safe now. 837 01:20:23,666 --> 01:20:26,165 The man that did this to you is in police custody. 838 01:20:26,250 --> 01:20:28,790 He's going to be in prison for a very long time. 839 01:20:32,083 --> 01:20:34,332 Can you recall anything at all about last night? 840 01:20:46,750 --> 01:20:49,332 Christine, I've brought you a visitor. 841 01:20:49,791 --> 01:20:53,457 I'm hoping this may be the breakthrough we've been looking for. 842 01:21:02,625 --> 01:21:04,499 That gentleman is Ben. 843 01:21:05,875 --> 01:21:08,582 You were married but you've been apart for four years. 844 01:21:28,666 --> 01:21:30,665 She's awake. 845 01:21:31,125 --> 01:21:32,749 Thank you. 846 01:21:46,333 --> 01:21:47,957 Christine. 847 01:21:49,125 --> 01:21:50,665 It's Ben. 848 01:21:53,291 --> 01:21:55,040 Your Ben. 849 01:21:59,666 --> 01:22:02,749 If I'd have known you were in any kind of danger, 850 01:22:03,125 --> 01:22:05,749 I'd never have stayed away. 851 01:22:06,750 --> 01:22:08,499 I had to. 852 01:22:11,083 --> 01:22:13,124 For Adam's sake. 853 01:22:28,958 --> 01:22:30,082 He's our son, Chris. 854 01:22:35,750 --> 01:22:38,082 And he loves you very much. 855 01:22:40,541 --> 01:22:42,415 We both do. 856 01:23:54,375 --> 01:23:59,832 Hi. 857 01:24:09,541 --> 01:24:11,165 I'm Adam. 858 01:24:16,000 --> 01:24:17,457 Adam. 859 01:24:25,083 --> 01:24:26,415 "When..." 860 01:24:26,500 --> 01:24:28,060 "When you wake up in the morning, Pooh," 861 01:24:28,125 --> 01:24:30,624 "what's the first thing you say to yourself?" 862 01:24:35,208 --> 01:24:36,790 "I say..." 863 01:24:39,041 --> 01:24:40,999 "What's for breakfast?" 864 01:24:42,625 --> 01:24:44,707 "What do you say, Piglet?" 865 01:24:48,208 --> 01:24:50,499 "I say... I say..." 866 01:24:52,375 --> 01:24:56,165 "I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?" 867 01:25:04,041 --> 01:25:05,915 You remembered. 868 01:25:08,500 --> 01:25:10,124 Oh... 869 01:25:13,208 --> 01:25:20,332 Adam. 870 01:25:23,083 --> 01:25:31,083 I remember. 871 01:25:49,916 --> 01:25:51,499 Adam. 872 01:25:52,583 --> 01:25:54,582 My Adam.